This is my first attempt at a sketch:
GRAMS: GROUND FORCE TV SHOW OPENING MUSIC.
A DRUID IS WALKING TOWARDS THE CAMERA. ALAN TITCHMARSH IS WALKING BEHIND HIM WITH HIS HANDS OVER THE DRUIDS EYES.
DRUID:
Can I look yet?
ALAN:
Hang on. OK
ALAN TAKES HIS HANDS AWAY. THE DRUID LOOKS. WE SEE A SHOT OF STONEHENGE.
ALAN:
Surprise!
DRUID
Oh.
ALAN:
It's a symbolic representation of the spiritual.
DRUID:
Right.
ALAN:
It connects our lives to the sacred through the juxtaposition of aspects of our material culture.
DRUID:
I see. What does it actually do?
ALAN:
It encapsulates the relationship between the sacred and the physical.
DRUID:
<slowly>Right.
ALAN:
<Looks a little uncomfortable> Well, it's a work in progress. We're obviously going to have to bury some of the village children at key points in the circle.
DRUID:
I'm not sure I really get it. It's not what I asked for.
ALAN:
Oh.
DRUID:
I wanted a rockery.
