British Comedy Guide

Sootyj's signage business still in business

SCENE1

INCREDIBLY FAT MEN AND WOMEN ARE ON TREAD MILLS, 2 TONED GYMN FASCISTS STAND BEHIND THEM ALTERNATLEY WHIP THEM AND SHOOT AT THEIR FEET.
THE INCREDIBLY FAT MEN AND WOMEN ARE SWEATING AND TERRIFIED

SCENE2

A COLLECTION OF VERY THIN TYPES ARE IN DENTIST CHAIRS, STRAPPED IN PLACE WITH THEIR JAWS WIRED OPEN. A COUPLE OF PODGY GREGG'S STAFF TYPES SHOVE PASTIES LIQUIFIED WITH MILK SHAKES DOWN THE THIN TYPES OPEN MOUTHS.
THE VERY THIN TYPES LOOK EVEN MORE TERRIFIED THEN THE INCREDIBLEY FAT MEN AND WOMEN.

SCENE3

SOOTYJ IS DRAGGED OFF BY A POLICE OFFICER WHO COMEDICALLY BOPS HIM ON THE HEAD WITH A TRUNCHEON.

A SECOND POLICEMAN CARRYS THE FOLLOWING 2 SIGNS "Fitness first" AND "Fatness first"

Oops could some one delete the other 3 please, apologies my computer went funny.

(Wish I suddenly went funny).

Sooty you used the wrong font in the last sign you did for me. You used a church font. I put my back out taking it out of the box.

I've written to Watchdog you f**ker.

You numbskull you ruined that Christening!

Oi vay at least it wasn't a circumcision.

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