Pirate flags! Pirate flags! 
Things that piss you off Page 523
That's what I figured. Although they do have sparkly candles for their cupcakes...
Now that's just silly.
Quote: Tim Walker @ October 10 2009, 12:58 AM BSTNow that's just silly.
The songs they sing for the guests are much like the song from IT Crowd in Messy Joes...
TTPYO - everything.
Usually very little pisses me off. But it's my birthday, someone is going out of his way to ruin it and my internet connection is slow. Argghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's your birthday???????? 
Quote: AndreaLynne @ October 10 2009, 1:27 BSTsomeone is going out of his way to ruin it
Who ?
Say the word and I'm on the first Virgin Atlantic flight to punch his lights out !
(Is he about 4'2" and three stone? Just want to be sure of my ground before I leave!)
Yes, 33 years ago my mother was in a delivery room waiting to be induced while a crazy lady across the hall was yelling "Get this f**king thing outta me!" Real confidence booster for a woman who was really not fit to be a mom.
I never make a big deal of my birthday, only because my kids always feel bad that their dad never takes them out to get me anything and we never go anywhere to celebrate. That's why the kids and I are going to the skeevy place they like where a guy in an ill-fitting pirate costume will sing his modified rendition of happy Birthday with a stuffed green parrot on his shoulder. And I'm sure we'll have a wonderful time, just us. 
Quote: Oldrocker @ October 10 2009, 1:40 AM BSTWho ?
Say the word and I'm on the first Virgin Atlantic flight to punch his lights out !
(Is he about 4'2" and three stone? Just want to be sure of my ground before I leave!)
My ex. He's 5'11", 180 pounds and thinks he's frickin Chuck Norris. he's legally blind and has a heart condition. Go for the knees. He'll crumple like a paper bag.
Ah, legally blind ? Does that mean he can see me coming or what?
It's just that Virgin might charge me extra for anything longer than a baseball bat !
I've got a nice sharp stick. No, on reflection that wouldn't move us on much.
Hope you have a great time !
Really.
I'll save the pirate flag from the mashed potatoes for ya.
Quote: DaButt @ October 10 2009, 12:36 AM BSTMy former mother in-law is preparing for her second cornea transplant after years of pain and poor eyesight due to a vision-correcting procedure gone wrong. I'd rather wear glasses.
You'd likely still require reading glasses at some stage in your life. My co-worker is 43 and raves about how great his procedure was, but he's started wearing reading glasses during the last few months. Our eyes wear out as we age and there's no getting around it.
We had a teacher who got laser surgery for his short-sighted...ness, but now has to wear glasses for his long-sighted...ness because your eyes 'go the other way' prescription wise as you get older or something. 
Quote: Tim Walker @ October 10 2009, 12:42 AM BSTJust remember that as you age you naturally become more long-sighted (due to change in the shape of the eyeball). So if you're short-sighted it should actually improve with age anyway.
That's it!
So I've got to wear glasses or have headaches? 
I'll spend the money on cosmetic surgery instead.
Contact lenses? Or can't you and I missed you saying so?
Quote: Scatterbrained Floozy @ October 10 2009, 9:59 PM BSTContact lenses? Or can't you and I missed you saying so?
They don't agree with me. I had to go to A&E at the eye hospital five times this year to have errant ones removed. With an average wait of four hours each time, that's a lot of life wasted.
I had half a one stuck in there for over four weeks once.