British Comedy Guide

Things that piss you off Page 1,830

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 30th July 2022, 9:58 AM

Chappers will think they are virtual cough sweets.

? To be honest, I did it mainly to keep him off Spotify.
I'd rather he/I bought the music.
Having said that I'm coming round to Spotify now - but if I find something I like I still buy it on iTunes.

Pundits and the like who start or finish their piece of punditry with "if I'm honest" or "I won't lie". I should hope they are being honest and not lying, otherwise there's not much point in their being there and broadcasting their views to the nation. However, now they've put it into the viewers' minds that, at times, they may not be honest, is there really any point in ever listening to them at all?

You're welcome to your opinion on abortion, and you're welcome to express it. But it won't make f**k all difference. I refuse to believe that members of the Supreme Court are gonna pass a law and then say, 'Wait a minute. Sally Staines from Stoke writes on her Facebook page, 'F**k you, you f**king bunch of f**king f**kers, it's f**king my f**king body, I'll f**king do what the f**king f**k I f**king want with it...' Yerse, I never thought about it like that before. We ARE f**king f**kers, aren't we? Let's change this law we've been pushing for the last six years.'

PS The abortionists are right to say that every woman has the right to do what she wants with her body. That's why I support them. The unborn kids, I mean.

Personally I think bringing a new person into THIS world is incredibly cruel!

War, disease, poverty, Truss, - you're welcome!

Geee thanks mom

Well, that's up to you. If you wanna say this world is shit, or you wanna do something tiny to make it slightly less shit.

Quote: lofthouse @ 8th August 2022, 12:04 PM

Personally I think bringing a new person into THIS world is incredibly cruel!

We're living in what are probably the best years humanity has ever seen. Don't let politicians, the media, and people with an agenda convince you otherwise.

Quote: lofthouse @ 8th August 2022, 12:04 PM

War, disease, poverty

There are fewer of those than at any time in human history. Enjoy the ride, and if you aren't happy with something, endeavor to change it, while occasionally reminding yourself about how much better we have it than those who came before us.

Gay rights activists. What's up their ass?

Burgers where they pile them too high.
Who do they think they are serving? Reticulated pythons!

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 12th August 2022, 10:17 PM

Burgers where they pile them too high.
Who do they think they are serving? Reticulated pythons!

I used to take the skewer out until I realised why they are there.

I'm so sick of this phoney positivity all over f**king Facebook. Dare to criticise total f**king shit and you're a hater. 'Haters gonna hate.' If Adolf Hitler was around spreading his racial theories and I called him a c**t, you'd be all 'Stop being so negative all the time. Look for the good in people. You like the Spice Girls, he likes genocide, live and let live. Haters gonna hate.' F**k you.

Charging my ipod I keep getting flashed up "Let's scan your external drive" every 2 seconds.

"Mummy why don't we ever have Birds Eye Green cuisine dippers? Is it because you fear change?"

"No sweetie, it's because they taste like dog shit"

Spooky, I was going to post something similar. They must have spent millions on that ad as it's on every channel every ad break.

Quote: lofthouse @ 29th August 2022, 7:29 PM

"Mummy why don't we ever have Birds Eye Green cuisine dippers? Is it because you fear change?"

"No sweetie, it's because they taste like dog shit"

?

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