People who don't deliver my new purple laptop after I wait in all day for it.
I hate working from home. I need to get out. Grumble.
Things that piss you off Page 1,449
That's part of the punchline to a very sexist joke.
People that show up to court with walking sticks / wheelchairs / etc. even though they don't need them in order to try and get sympathy or a lighter sentence.
Like this trainee solicitor who starved her dog to death -
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-bristol-26957478
My favourite one is women who know when their court date is coming up and get pregnant. If there is any reason to bring a new cherished life into this world, it's to get their Mum off a credit card fraud conviction.
the courts do lock up pregnant women and theres a good chance your kids will end up in care
That woman is not well. "Gammon had piled tins of dog food and dog treats outside the kitchen - feet away from where Roxy was locked inside."
Sick. She needs help.
Quote: sootyj @ 9th April 2014, 10:18 PM BSTthe courts do lock up pregnant women and theres a good chance your kids will end up in care
They do, but they are definitely more reticent to. I can count on the fingers of one hand the amount of pregnant women I've lost to custody. Only then it was because the judge had no other option.
I do get a lot of male clients with pregnant girlfriends and "Baby Mommas". Often they are two different women, both of whom turn up to court.
I am not sure if that is a deliberate attempt to stay out of prison or a complete lack of knowledge of the facts of life.
For example, my conversation with one chap went as follows:
Him: "I can't believe my bloody girlfriend is pregnant again".
Me: "Well is it yours?"
Him: "Yes"
Me: "Then you had something to do with it. It's not entirely her fault."
Him: "It's all her fault."
Me: "Why didn't you use contraception?"
Him: "Contra-what?"
Unless it's a personality disorder, in which case she just made a very dark and morally questionable choice.
Quote: Jennie @ 9th April 2014, 10:23 PM BSTMe: "Why didn't you use contraception?"
Him: "Because I'm not the one who get's bloody pregnant!"
It's like eating dodgy seafood when you're abroad. You knew the risks, no one forced you to buy it, but now you've got the shits. Technically, the fish stall with no refrigeration at the side of the highway was to blame, but really, it was your own fault.
Exactly the same goes for the moron bloke who's now going to have to pay for it. It's his own fault.
Quote: zooo @ 9th April 2014, 10:33 PM BSTExactly the same goes for the moron bloke who's now going to have to pay for it. It's his own fault.
Please refer to my previous insanely sexist rant about men thinking they're brilliant and women thinking they are blameless for more clarification on the matter.
ridiculous jobs, write a psychological thriller of 6000 words for 20 dollars.
I snuck up on a tramp and hit him with a hammer, again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
then I went hope and had a cup of tea, again.
Quote: sootyj @ 9th April 2014, 11:14 PM BSTridiculous jobs, write a psychological thriller of 6000 words for 20 dollars.
I snuck up on a tramp and hit him with a hammer, again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and again
and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again again and againthen I went hope and had a cup of tea, again.
*extract courtesy of The Teletubbie Murders by sootyj*
That one would probably involve Dipsy slicing off the NuNus Tinkywink and sticking it in LaLa.
I may also write slash CBEEBIES stories, In the lady garden
Has anyone mentioned 'Selfie'?
Moron's replacement for 'Self Portrait'.
If we let them idiots who don't know any words will re-create our entire lexicon complete with inaccurate words and phrases such a obligated when they mean obliged etc..
I think a selfie is different from a self-portrait in that it is typically executed with a phone's camera, at arm's length. I quite like the term, because it also sounds like it could mean another act of self-gratification which is basically what such self-portraits are.
Sites that want to sell you an item but make you register or join before you can pay for it.
Not only that, while registering, if you miss one box that you are supposed to fill in, the form is resubmitted with some other box's now blank. You miss the blank box and the form is resubmitted again.
F**k it, I'll buy it somewhere else.