British Comedy Guide

Leaping Tiger

SCENE: INT - MARTIAL ARTS MONASTERY

A SHAVEN HEADED HOLY MAN IS SEATED IN THE LOTUS POSITION ON A SMALL RAISED PLATFORM. A MONK, LEAPING TIGER, LIES PROSTRATE AT HIS FEET.

HOLY MAN: I hear you are unhappy with our ways, Leaping Tiger.

LEAPING TIGER: I am unworthy, oh Holy One.

HOLY MAN: That is indeed so. The path to enlightenment requires that two feet take the same journey - both must follow the sacred route. But I have watched your progress with interest and see that you have learned many things while you have been here.

LEAPING TIGER: I have learned the skills of a warrior, My Lord. Fleetness of foot and sharpness of mind - I can outrun my very own shadow but have failed in my duty to you. There is a new challenge I now must face.

HOLY MAN: The snow leopard faces many trials in his life, Leaping Tiger. But It is not the spot on his coat that betrays him, it is the footprint in the snow. What is this new challenge you must face?

LEAPING TIGER: Sc**thorpe United.

HOLY MAN: (pauses thoughtfully. Then, with gusto...) Green Ar-my!

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Very nice build up to:

LEAPING TIGER: Sc**thorpe United.

The football section goes over my head slightly so others could probably give you a more informed crit of that part but I thought it was nicely written, very easy to read with a nice angle.

Welcome to the BCG.

Hi, Giggle-O

Thanks for your welcome and taking time to read and comment.

The Sc**thorpe asterix came a quite a surprise! Obviously a clever and careful editting tool at work.

Cheers and thanks once again.

ev

BTW it's asterisk not Asterix. I always used to make that mistake!

:)

Look forward to reading more of your sketches/writing.

Oops! well yes of course - them thar star thingies.

Cheers

ev

Well hello there Evertsen.
A nicely written piece with a funny clash of worlds.

I knew one such as you in times gone by. back in the land of rising Sonny.
Alas I fear I can never return.
So It's nice to see you here, be you he.
Welcome to the BCG.

Hi Steve - thanks for comments and the kind welcome.

I am indeed, he from over the big mountain in the land of Sonny. Sorry to hear you say that things got all cocked up for you over there, but this place seems to be pretty dammned good to me -i'm still finding my feet, mind you!

Thanks once again.

ev

I liked this, good stuff.

Thanks, Angiebaby. much appreciated.

Hi evertsen. Not a football fan but still found it enjoyable, mostly because of the Roy Orbison thing which is just the sort thing I like. Skills, props etc.

Thanks Scratchyr. Yes, the Big O seemed like a good foil for the sanctity of the thing.

Cheers.

ev

I say sign him up - our midfield at Wolves could do with all the help it can get.

No probs. He's currently on international duty with the Bhutanese national squad - the Himalayan Nations Cup. I'll have him report to Molineux... Molinoo... Molin... Wolverhampton, soonest.

i think this is a great sketch either side of the mountain, nice one Ev

J26

Thanks, Johnny. I sense a warm feeling here at BSG.

ev

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