Okay you guys... be gentle with me...
EXT. STREET– DAY
A SUITED BUSINESSMAN IN HIS THIRTIES WITH A PLUMMY ACCENT IS APPROACHED BY A PUNK ROCKER, ALSO IN HIS THIRTIES.
PUNK: Spare a quid, mister?
THE SUIT PUTS A HAND IN HIS TROUSER POCKET.
SUIT: A pound? Gosh, in my day it was 10p!
PUNK: (DISINTERESTED) Oh yeah?
SUIT: Yes. I was a punk back in ’77. Well, 83 really, but I was only 12 in 1977 and still listening to ‘The Wombles’, to be fair. My mother would have had a fit if I'd used a safety pin for anything other than a Boy Scout first aid badge!
HE LAUGHS FALSELY.
PUNK: Oh… so you was a punk, was ya?
SUIT: (NODS VIGOROUSLY) Oh yes... yeah.
PUNK: (SUSPICIOUS) What music was you into, then?
SUIT: Erm... oh, god! You’re talking years back…
SUIT SQUIRMS.
PUNK LOOKS QUESTIONINGLY AT SUIT.
SUIT:
…the er... ‘Sex Pistons’ were one of the bands I liked.
HE STARTS SINGING IN A STILTED FASHION, WHILE CONDUCTING HIMSELF WITH ONE FINGER.
SUIT: 'Anarchy in the U.K., plumbing sometime, maybe...'
PUNK: Are you taking the piss?
SUIT: Good grief no! Not at all! Erm... what music do you listen to... you know, of an evening, with a nice bottle of red?
PUNK: Batteries ran out of the tape recorder at my squat.
HE HOLDS OUT HIS HAND.
SUIT: Yeah... I stayed in a squat once... unbelievably good fun. You know, when it got dark, we lit candles and got totally, totally wasted!
PUNK: Oh yeah… nice bit of hash, was it?
SUIT: I think it was banana skins, actually. Tommy Van Der Bloom’s idea... crazy days!
PUNK: (INCREDULOUS) You smoked banana skins?
SUIT: I think we just ate them... yes, that was right, because no-one had a lighter.
PUNK: So... how old was you then?
SUIT: About 12, I think.
PUNK: So... you was still listening to ‘The Wombles’ then... right?
SUIT: Ah… (BEAT) …you got me.
PUNK: You wasn’t really a punk, was ya?
THE SUIT SHAKES HIS HEAD, ASHAMED.
SUIT:Nope.
PUNK: And... it wasn’t a squat, was it?
SUIT: (SIGH) No... it was Tommy Van Der Bloom’s bedroom.
THE PUNK REMOVES SOMETHING FROM HIS POCKET AND PRESSES IT INTO THE SUIT'S HAND.
PUNK: Actually, I feel sorry for you, mate. At least I’ve lived a little... enjoy.
WITH THAT, HE TURNS AWAY, AND APPROACHES ANOTHER PUNTER FOR LOOSE CHANGE.
THE SUIT SLOWLY UNFURLS HIS HAND TO REVEAL A SMALL CANNABIS JOINT.
HE NODS APPRECIATIVELY, BEFORE BITING IT IN HALF AND WALKING OFF, GRIMACING
AS HE CHEWS.
