Agony aunts Page 7

Dear SJ...

It comes to down pure stimulation. The only cure for this most unfortunate situation is to carry on along this very route. Only then, will you reach the most needed light at the end of this unfortunately dark and dismal tunnel.

So my advise, watch 50 first dates 50 times whilst standing up, and then repeat for another 50 times, but this time sitting down. After which, Masturbate for 20 hours a day solid.(you may become raw, but no pain no gain.) into a park bench whilst holding a stolen brick which is considered Art; and take photographs of your bed, and then post them online. Then after all that, if you still want to watch this pile of shit. Shoot yourself you poor bastard.

Yours Lovingly

Aunty BCG.

Dear Auntie BCG

In my organisation our chief exec has a weekly blog, that I feel is a little dry. I make some pin money rewriting and writing other people's blogs to make them funny. Should I write to him and suggest I can his funnier?

Or should I listen to the voices in my head and burn down the local women's institute?

Yours hopefully Sootyj (Mrs)