An aging man is walking briskly down an old looking street and approaches someone in Victorian attire to ask him the time. The Victorian looking man is wearing a name badge 'Sir Pipe'
Aging Man: Hello sir, can you tell me the time please?
Victorian Man: (POSHLY SPOKEN) No, why don't you look at your own clock you heathen?
Aging Man:For why? My clock is broken after excavating and climbing down mine shafts.
V Man:Well, you should consider lucky that such a nobleman carries such a fine timepiece that records the time exactly to the nearest mille-second. It's also a compass don't you know…
Aging Man:Yes, one would imagine that such a gentleman would be carrying such fine jewels. Now sir, can you please tell a good fellow the time please?
V Man:I will only tell you the time if you bequest to me your time and space. Now step back and admire me you small peasant-chap.
Aging man:That I will Sir Pipe, I shall marvel at your fine tailoring and personal performance.
Two minutes passed of the Aging Man admiring Sir Pipe, looking him up and down, stitch by stitch, cloth by cloth
Aging Man:Now Sir Pipe, one has admired and been overcome by such a fine example of a man, can thee give me the time for I desperately need to make a rendezvous in a time that is making me sweat.
V Man: (bellowing)You will receive the time when your worth has been proven. Now write me a poem, and then sing me the finest song you can recollect.
The aging Man started to sing the national anthem.
V Man:what a mediocre rendition of a fine piece of music. You can forget the poem. Be gone with you…
Aging Man now profusely sweating
Aging Man:
Please Sir Pipe, I request with added admiration for your person and your timepiece, the time, at this time of the day right now!
V Man:I shall only give you the time if you slay my hedge and dig my weeds!
PAUSE
Aging Man: Twat
Aging man disappears in a portal
V Man (Dazzled)Oh
END
