British Comedy Guide

Morrissey collapses on stage Page 2

Quote: Kenneth @ October 25 2009, 10:41 AM BST

Wilde chose to stay in England and face imprisonment. Read his works and see that he considered self-sacrifice to be the ultimate expression of love.

I actually consider the self-sacrificial act of holding off from farting on the first 30 dates to be the ultimate expression of love.

30! - that's more than a lifestime's worth for me. No 30 mins acceptable, but no more.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ October 25 2009, 2:23 PM BST

30! - that's more than a lifestime's worth for me. No 30 mins acceptable, but no more.

Have you no shame! :D

Quote: Leevil @ October 25 2009, 1:19 PM BST

I was hoping it would be Neil. :(

Because of what he done did to Les Dennis? AMEN!

Morrissey is out now.
(Out of hospital I mean. He was out a couple of years ago - like, no-one really knew.)

A spokeswoman for the hospital said: "Morrissey became unwell, and he was admitted overnight as a precautionary measure. He's been seen by the medical team, much improved and now discharged home."

Unwell is nicely unspecific. I hope this experience gives him inspiration for a happy new cheery song.

Quote: Ronnie Anderson @ October 25 2009, 11:30 AM BST

He can't have had a heart attack. he won't have.

why on earth not?

It'll be 'exhaustion' - a condition that appears to effect only the rich and/or famous.

Has anyone ever heard of a working-class pauper being admitted to hospital with 'exhaustion'?

I prefer to call it 'exhaust'.

"Exhaustion" tends to be a euphemism for anxiety attack/attempted overdose/accidental overdose/drug or alcohol abuse/Amy Winehouse.

Oh well Neil. Hope you get better soon.

Morrisey hit by bottle at concert

Thousands of Morrissey fans have been left disappointed when the star axed a concert mid way through the second song.

The former Smiths frontman, who collapsed on stage three weeks ago, was hit by a bottle of beer thrown from the crowd at the Echo Arena in Liverpool.

Morrissey had opened the concert with the words: "It's Saturday, it's Liverpool, it's raining, it's perfect" before launching into the Smiths' hit This Charming Man, had shown no signs of the respiratory illness which saw him hospitalised overnight on October 24.

But during his second song, Black Cloud, the 50-year-old stepped to the front of the stage to shake the hands of fans when a plastic bottle of beer was hurled toward him and struck him in the eye.

The singer stood up and said "goodnight" to the stunned 8,000 strong crowd before walking off stage.

His fans then burst into chants of "Morrissey, Morrissey. Morrissey" in an effort to get the performance back on track.

But about five minutes later an announcement was made to a chorus of boos that he had been hit on the head and would not be resuming the concert.

Jay Silker, 27, from Mossley Hill, Liverpool, said: "If there's ever a singer who would not take kindly to a bottle being thrown at him, it's Morrissey."

Iain Kavanagh, 33, from Liverpool, said: "Some people were complaining afterwards because he's been in the game for years and he should be used to it by now.

"But he's a 50-year-old man who has just been ill and he deserves better than that."

I love the quotes there, like it's an everyday occurrence that he gets stuff thrown at him and he should just get on with it.

"If there's ever a singer who would not take kindly to a bottle being thrown at him, it's Morrissey."

There's his epitaph, right there.

:D

In my life, why do I smile at people who I'd much rather bottle in the eye . . . ?

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