INT. NIGHT. BEDROOM.
A WOMAN SITS UP IN BED, ARMS FOLDED. SHE LOOKS UNHAPPY.
SHE REACHES OVER TO HER BEDSIDE CABINET AND GETS A CIGARETTE AND LIGHTS IT UP.
HER HUSBAND IS ALSO SITTING UP AND REACHES OVER TO HIS BEDSIDE CABINET TO GET A CIGARETTE.
THE WOMAN LOOKS TO HER HUSBAND, ROLLS HER EYES AND SHAKES HER HEAD.
HIS CIGARETTE IS NOT STRAIGHT BUT DROOPY.
Makes me want a cigarette. It's OK as a joke, not much for a sketch though.
I didn't mind it.
I thought it was ok. How about she looks over at him whilst taking her first puff, and he's stubbing his out? Echoing (sp?) the sex.
INT. NIGHT. BEDROOM.
A WOMAN SITS UP IN BED, ARMS FOLDED. SHE LOOKS UNHAPPY.
SHE REACHES OVER TO HER BEDSIDE CABINET AND GETS A CIGARETTE AND LIGHTS IT UP.
HER HUSBAND IS ALSO SITTING UP AND REACHES OVER TO HIS BEDSIDE CABINET TO GET A CIGARETTE.
THE WOMAN LOOKS TO HER HUSBAND, ROLLS HER EYES AND SHAKES HER HEAD, SHE TAKES A LONG DRAG OF HER CIGARETTE AND LOOKS BACK AT HER HUSBAND.
HE STUBBS HIS FAG BUTT OUT IN THE ASHTRAY AND SWITCHES OFF THE LIGHT.
Or something...
If it was filmed I'd have it end in darkness apart from the glowing end of her cigarette. 
I like it, but I'd see it more as a punchline for a card.
I like it as it is 
Quote: random @ September 9 2009, 8:53 PM BSTI like it as it is
Ditto
This has basically been done a number of times in anti-smoking campaigns, in this country and others.