Please tell me this has not been done before.
--
INT. AN AFRICAN SCHOOLHOUSE. DAY.
ENTER CHARITY WORKER AND SPONSOR.
WORKER:
Mrs Patterson, it really is so good of you to come. Money from people like you makes all the difference to these children, but very few take the time to travel all the way to Africa to visit. Anyway, here she is!
A SICKLY AFRICAN CHILD SITS CROSS-LEGGED ON THE FLOOR.
SPONSOR LOOKS DISAPPOINTED
SPONSOR:
Is that it?
WORKER:
Is that what? This is Abagbe, your sponsor child.
SPONSOR:
She's not even doing anything.
WORKER:
What were you expecting?
SPONSOR:
I don't know. A fun run? Swimming laps? Something. She's not even in fancy dress.
WORKER:
I don't understand.
SPONSOR:
Oh, I get it, is it a sponsored silence? Is it, Abagbe? Are you doing a sponsored silence?
ABAGBE:
I don't like the lady.
WORKER:
Mrs Patterson, these children are starving…
SPONSOR:
Oh, I see… it's a 24-hour famine.
WORKER:
It's not that kind of sponsorship…
SPONSOR:
Don't worry. I thought something like this would happen, so we brought a surprise. Mr Patterson!
MR PATTERSON PUSHES IN A BATH TUB, FILLED WITH BAKED BEANS.
WORKER:
What the…?
SPONSOR:
Come on Abagbe, climb in. Don't be shy now. Come on.
ABAGBE:
I don't want to go in the beans.
SPONSOR:
Come on kiddo, don't be selfish. This is for charity. Think of all the starving children in Africa.
SHE PICKS UP THE KID AND LOWERS HER INTO THE BEANS.
THE CHARITY WORKER LOOKS ON, SPEECHLESS.
ABAGBE RAISES A HANDFUL OF BEANS TO HER MOUTH, BUT HER SPONSOR SLAPS IT AWAY.
END
