EXT. A PARK. DAY
A MIDDLE-AGED MAN IS JOGGING.
SUDDENLY, HE CLUTCHES HIS CHEST AND COLLAPSES
CUT TO:
EXT. THE GATES OF HEAVEN. ETERNITY.
ST PETER STANDS GUARD WITH A CLIPBOARD. HE'S WEARING SUNGLASSES.
THE DEAD MAN MATERIALISES, STILL IN HIS JOGGING GEAR, AND APPROACHES ST PETER WITH A MIXTURE OF BEWILDERMENT AND AWE.
ST. PETER LOOKS HIM UP AND DOWN.
ST. PETER:
No trainers.
Neat.
Nice one.
Back on form Mr Kelly.
Oops, sorry Mr Murphy.
Quote: Nil Putters @ July 31 2009, 7:51 AM BST
I agree, Mr Kelly, but didn't that other Catholic fella, Murphy write a similar sketch?
Nice and concise but I think 'No trainers' in an incongruous situation is a bit old hat. (I hilariously said 'No trainers' to everyone arriving to my ten year old son's party fifteen years ago.)
Interestingly (and in Morace archivist style), try this thread:
Quote: Morrace @ July 31 2009, 8:45 AM BSTI agree, Mr Kelly, but didn't that other Catholic fella, Murphy write a similar sketch?
Quote: JohnnyD @ July 31 2009, 9:12 AM BSTNice and concise but I think 'No trainers' in an incongruous situation is a bit old hat. (I hilariously said 'No trainers' to everyone arriving to my ten year old son's party fifteen years ago.)
Interestingly (and in Morace archivist style), try this thread:
Bah! No new ideas, etc...
Quote: JohnnyD @ July 31 2009, 9:12 AM BSTNice and concise but I think 'No trainers' in an incongruous situation is a bit old hat.
Maybe there could be an update with no one being allowed to smoke in hell. Instead the damned souls are smouldering outside Heaven's gates.
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ July 31 2009, 12:13 PM BSTBah! No new ideas, etc...
Don't worry, Kevin, all is not lost. Here's an alternative:
________________________________________________________________________________
EXT. PARK. DAY
A MIDDLE-AGED MAN, DENNIS IS JOGGING.
SUDDENLY, HE CLUTCHES HIS CHEST AND COLLAPSES
CUT TO:
EXT. THE GATES OF HEAVEN. ETERNITY.
ST PETER STANDS GUARD WITH A CLIPBOARD. HE'S WEARING SUNGLASSES.
DEAD TOBY MATERIALISES, STILL IN HIS JOGGING GEAR, AND APPROACHES ST PETER WITH A MIXTURE OF BEWILDERMENT AND AWE.
SAINT PETER CONSULTS HIS CLIPBOARD.
SAINT PETER:
Name?
DENNIS:
Dennis Wilkinson
SAINT PETER:
Sorry - you're not on the Guest List
________________________________________________________________________________
Or... 'weren't you aka BadMouthAll on a forum I used to visit? Get him lads.'
I'm laughing at my own joke there in case no-one else does.
This is excellent and would get a laugh from most people.
Good luring thread title, too.
It was OK.
To answer your question. Heaven would be whereever you'd imagine it being filmed.
In a white studio: INT.
In a field: EXT.
Not sure if your title and question is rhetorical but there you go anyway 
Quote: Leevil @ July 31 2009, 1:54 PM BSTIt was OK.
To answer your question. Heaven would be whereever you'd imagine it being filmed.
In a white studio: INT.
In a field: EXT.
Not sure if your title and question is rhetorical but there you go anyway
I was a little curious, since he's standing *outside* the gates of heaven. But I think your answer nails it, and now I feel like an idiot rookie.
EXT. is short for Exterior, and means that the scene is to look as though it was shot in the open air.
INT. is short for Interior, and means that the scene is to be look as though it was shot inside, (either in a real house or real building, or in a studio set that has been created to look like the inside of a building.)
http://www.screenwritinggoldmine.com/what-do-int-and-ext-mean-when-i-see-them-in-a-screenplay.htm