MAN IS TALKING TO A WOMAN AT A COUNTER.
MAN
I'd like some of your freebies please and lots as I believe they are free!
WOMAN
Are you sure what would a man like you need with our freebues? Come here for your girlfriend that's very sweet of you.
MAN
God know it would be far to dangerous for her. These are purely for my adventures.
WOMAN
What exactly are you going to use them for?
MAN
Oh I like to hammer them into tight crevices with a special hammer, then hang my weight from them.
WOMAN
What you monster! That's so cruel and dangerous.
MAN
Not at all I have lots of rope and I've conquered loads of the ugly bitches.
SCENE2
MAN IS BEING DRAGGED OUTSIDE BY 2 FEMALE POLICE OFFICERS AS WOMAN CHASES AFTER HITTING HIM WITH A SHOE.
SOOTYJ STANDS OUTSIDE THE SHOP WITH 2 SIGNS
ONE READS "Free Tampons." THE OTHER "Free crampons."
SOOTYJ
Knickers.