British Comedy Guide

Policies out for the lads.

GORDON BROWN IS BEING INTERVIEWED BY A JOURNALIST.

JOURNALIST
Primeminister how do you respond to accusations that you run a laddish cabinet?

GORDON
Absolute nonsense.

JOURNALIST
Then why are you in an interview with me a journalist from Nuts magazine?

GORDON
Because you provide the most boobs for a quid. Damn!

JOURNALIST
But Caroline Flint said you only had women in your cabinet as window dressing?

GORDON
Who?

JOURNALIST
Caroline FLint minister for employment?

GORDON
Eh?

JOURNALIST
Cracking tits and long legs?

GORDON
Oh her. I wouldn't have minded dressing her window box eh, much better than having to stare at Jack Straw.

JOURNALIST
As the journalist for a magazine that featured an erotic photoshoot of Mother Theresa even I am shocked.

GORDON
Oh don't be such a pussy it's always been New Labour New Laddishness. We only invaded Iraq because Tony Blair could piss higher than Tony Benn.

JOURNALIST
But what about Jaqui Smith Britain's first female home secretary.

FX JAQUI ENTERS THE OFFICE.

JAQUI
I think I can answer that.

FX SOUND OF FLIES BEING UNDONE AND URINATING.

GORDON
Well done my son! In the waste paper basket from 6 foot!

There's a couple of good ideas in here - interview with Nuts, Gordy only recognising Flint by her sexual attributes - but it lacks quality over the length. Reckon there is going to be quite a few sent in on this topic.

Damn I do seem to be sucking today I was thinking more News Revue with this one.

In that case you have a bit more time to polish it up.

Ooh cutting! But I shall do and as for the stage I shall many f**ks and bollocks.

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