INT. DAY.HOME.
AN ESTATE AGENT IS ENTERING THE BEDROOM OF A HOME FOLLOWED BY A COUPLE.
AGENT:
This is the master bedroom, en suite of course with an additional built-in toilet disguised as a wardrobe.
MAN:
Two toilets in one room, that's handy.
AGENT:
The hall, as you can see, is very spacious and has an ornate bespoke urinal.
WOMAN:
One for the lads, nice use of space though.
AGENT:
Now, feast your eyes on this exquisite living room which comes complete with two large prefab portaloos.
MAN:
Beer, flatscreen telly, portaloos... I've got a good feeling about this love.
AGENT:
Next, we have the farmhouse style kitchen.
WOMAN:
Toilet free?
AGENT:
Not so madam, that chair you're beside doubles up as a commode.
WOMAN:
Oooh! That's clever. Do you mind?
AGENT:
Be my guest madam.
FX PEEING SOUND.
MAN:
This property has how many toilets?
AGENT:
Eighteen in total.
WOMAN:
That last place had twenty four. Pass me some toilet roll dear.
MAN:
Erm, here, use this kitchen roll. Yeah, but it didn't have the portaloos.
AGENT:
When you start hitting mid twenties for toilets then you're really at the high end of the market.
WOMAN:
Hmmm, it would have been very tight. Has there been much interest in this place?
AGENT:
Considerable interest, I'm going to be busy all day.
CUT TO OUTSIDE OF HOUSE. A LARGE NUMBER OF COUPLES ARE QUEUEING TO GET IN. THEY ARE GRIMACING AND BENDING THEIR KNEES, DESPERATE TO USE THE TOILET.
EDITED FOR NEW ENDING.
- but I was disappointed with the punchline (if you could call it that). It's a shame 'cos I know there's one there somewhere. Maybe someone else could come up with one!