British Comedy Guide

My life feels in limbo at the moment... Page 7

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ June 23 2009, 3:14 PM BST

What is so bad about living in Britain?

Would it be the temperate climate, that's not only interesting and good for agriculture?

The fact that it has no real risk of natural disaster - like earthquake, volcanos, tornados, bush fires, etc?

It has a free health service?

England has one the lowest homicide rates amongst developed countries?

It has one of the better records for free speech and human rights?

Some of the biggest corruption in politics involves getting people to pay for your moat being cleaned, rather than poll fixing?

It has a tolerant attitude to sex and pregnancy out of marriage?

In general, the weather in Britain is terrible. Anybody remember last summer? No, because we didn't have one.

Natural disasters are low - true.

The NHS isn't free, we all pay for it with National Insurance - including boob jobs, hymen replacements for Mulsim women and sex changes.

England does not have one of the lowest homicide rates amongst developed countries, especially in Europe.

Free speech possibly, democracy never! I never voted for Gordon Brown as the Prime Minister, in fact none of us did, but there he is.

Corruption? Aside from the Royal Family, the government, the police, big corporations, etc. then you could be right. I always find it weird that whenever a big company is at fault, US citizens get ten times the compensation then British victims.

Tolerant attitude to sex and pregnancy outside of marriage - too true, we lead Europe (if not the world) in unwed teen pregnancies - woo hoo!

Nope, I'd still move to the States if given the opportunity.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

Free speech possibly, democracy never! I never voted for Gordon Brown as the Prime Minister, in fact none of us did, but there he is.

Ffs. We don't elect our Prime Minister, we never have, hence why the Prime Minister is weaker than most Presidents. Also, you know Gordon Brown is in the process of weakening his own powers even further, right? He's made proposals to give over prerogative powers (declarations of war etc.) over from the executive to parliament. I'm quite sure these reforms would've been implemented by now barring the economic crisis.

Not having elected Gordon Brown does not make us a non-democratic country.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

hymen replacements

Can't they get Richard Branson to pay for those? It'd be good advertising.

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 4:19 PM BST

By "ignoring" I meant not arresting and prosecuting. The stuff mentioned in this article will land you in a jail cell in the U.S.:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-381799/Let-burglars-caution-police-told.html

Erm, I'm not sure how familiar you are with the newspapers in the UK DaButt, but the Daily Mail would like the police to arrest people for being brown. Not exactly a balanced view.

As I understand it - I haven't got the figures to hand but I'm sure I've read this somewhere - the US has one of the highest rates of incarceration per capita in the Developed world. My knowledge of the American penal system is derived purely from shows like Law and Order and various novels, so I'm not going to pretend to be an expert, but is it necessarily a good thing to jail people for relatively 'minor' crimes?

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 4:37 PM BST

Can't they get Richard Branson to pay for those? It'd be good advertising.

People would just think they were selling c**ts.

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 3:52 PM BST

VIOLENT CRIME PER 100,000 PERSONS

Image
http://www.aic.gov.au/publications/cfi/cfi115.html

The sharp rise in the UK is due to changes to recording procedures, BTW.

Uk recording processes are notoriously poor, so I suspect the levels are higher.
Note the US does have lots of guns so people are likely to be violent only once.

As for Canada is that Curt wandering around punching people in the back of the head?

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

In general, the weather in Britain is terrible. Anybody remember last summer? No, because we didn't have one.

I like our weather, I hate, hate when it gets too hot. Personally I like living here.

I'm agreeing with you again Stott! When the UK is temperate it's lovely, bit of rain bit of breeze gets a bit warm again later.
It's ace.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ June 23 2009, 4:44 PM BST

I like our weather, I hate, hate when it gets too hot. Personally I like living here.

Me too. And besides, if you don't like the weather just wait twenty minutes.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

In general, the weather in Britain is terrible. Anybody remember last summer? No, because we didn't have one.

Natural disasters are low - true.

The NHS isn't free, we all pay for it with National Insurance - including boob jobs, hymen replacements for Mulsim women and sex changes.

England does not have one of the lowest homicide rates amongst developed countries, especially in Europe.

Free speech possibly, democracy never! I never voted for Gordon Brown as the Prime Minister, in fact none of us did, but there he is.

Corruption? Aside from the Royal Family, the government, the police, big corporations, etc. then you could be right. I always find it weird that whenever a big company is at fault, US citizens get ten times the compensation then British victims.

Tolerant attitude to sex and pregnancy outside of marriage - too true, we lead Europe (if not the world) in unwed teen pregnancies - woo hoo!

Nope, I'd still move to the States if given the opportunity.

You're equating good weather with it being hot and dry. I'd rather have a nice green lawn than a spikey, bare patch that needs sprinklers on it 24/7.

I remember reading an article, several years a go now granted, that was about England's low homicide rate and why it was. The conclusion seemed to be that people here are slower to anger and we have a very structured society with a code of manners that generally avoids murderous confrontation.

I'd rather live in a country where single mothers can raise their own children without shame, than a society that takes them away for adoption.

The NHS very rarely funds cosmetic surgery and it's nearly always in the case of disfigurement from accident or illness (those bloody women getting boob jobs after masectomies, eh!). Far, far more cases of unneccasary funds being used in the NHS are from problems related to obsesity and dietry habits that follow American trends.

I have American relatives and I'd still rather live in the UK.

Quote: sootyj @ June 23 2009, 3:45 PM BST

I live in da Ghetto (well Islington actually that's where Tony Blair lives and he like invaded several countries, killed in 100,000s of and had people tortured so he's a pretty violent criminal).

Has he left Marylebone then?

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 3:52 PM BST

The sharp rise in the UK is due to changes to recording procedures, BTW.

And more immigrants.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ June 23 2009, 3:56 PM BST

I think London Manchester probably takes care of most of that, the rest of the country tends to be mcuh less violent crime-y. I come from Cumbria, I don't think I even heard of a violent crime taking place, let alone knew anyone who'd been involved in one!

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 4:04 PM BST

What is your definition of violent crime? Just curious, because I've read that UK police tend to ignore things like random punchings, threats and other things that would lead to an arrest here in the States.

They're not so much ignoring as restricted by mountains of paperwork.

Quote: DaButt @ June 23 2009, 4:19 PM BST

By "ignoring" I meant not arresting and prosecuting. The stuff mentioned in this article will land you in a jail cell in the U.S.:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-381799/Let-burglars-caution-police-told.html

You can blame delusional left-wing Governments for that.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

In general, the weather in Britain is terrible. Anybody remember last summer?

Yes. And yes, it is terrible. Nowhere near cold enough.

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

including boob jobs...

Unless you're trying to present reconstructive surgery as something that's a drain on NHS funds, then is that really true?

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ June 23 2009, 4:26 PM BST

Free speech possibly, democracy never! I never voted for Gordon Brown as the Prime Minister, in fact none of us did, but there he is.

That's because we don't vote for Prime Minisiters. Silly boy.

The NHS does give breast enlargements where there is clear evidence that it will improve the patients psychological health. e.g. it will save 1000s of squids in therapy, medication and related costs.
The fact that most women who have the op pay large sums privately indicate how rare it is to get the op.

NICE who make funding decisions for the NHS do an amazing job. And frankly if you pay your taxes, you need a boob job and the cost is reasonable then it's your right.

Quote: PhQnix @ June 23 2009, 4:32 PM BST

Also, you know Gordon Brown is in the process of weakening his own powers even further, right? He's made proposals to give over prerogative powers (declarations of war etc.) over from the executive to parliament. I'm quite sure these reforms would've been implemented by now barring the economic crisis.

Not to mention the EU. That's the real corrupt democracy-free zone.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ June 23 2009, 4:44 PM BST

I like our weather, I hate, hate when it gets too hot. Personally I like living here.

:)

Quote: sootyj @ June 23 2009, 5:00 PM BST

The NHS does give breast enlargements where there is clear evidence that it will improve the patients psychological health. e.g. it will save 1000s of squids in therapy

I'd still prefer people to have the therapy to be honest, than get themselves slashed up because they feel self conscious about some imagined problem. But that's probably just me.

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ June 23 2009, 4:49 PM BST

You're equating good weather with it being hot and dry. I'd rather have a nice green lawn than a spikey, bare patch that needs sprinklers on it 24/7.

:)

Quote: Dolly Dagger @ June 23 2009, 4:49 PM BST

You're equating good weather with it being hot and dry. I'd rather have a nice green lawn than a spikey, bare patch that needs sprinklers on it 24/7.

I remember reading an article, several years a go now granted, that was about England's low homicide rate and why it was. The conclusion seemed to be that people here are slower to anger and we have a very structured society with a code of manners that generally avoids murderous confrontation.

I'd rather live in a country where single mothers can raise their own children without shame, than a society that takes them away for adoption.

The NHS very rarely funds cosmetic surgery and it's nearly always in the case of disfigurement from accident or illness (those bloody women getting boob jobs after masectomies, eh!). Far, far more cases of unneccasary funds being used in the NHS are from problems related to obsesity and dietry habits that follow American trends.

I have American relatives and I'd still rather live in the UK.

I equate good weather with it not being miserable, cold and depressing for most of the year.

British people are not slow to anger, that is a myth. Historically, we've been the most violent people who've ever strode the planet. We avoid murdering each other because we live on a tiny island and can't escape from the authorities easily. That is the only deterrent.

I'm not having a go at single mothers - just the crap ones who raise broods of rampaging criminals.

The NHS funds an entire range of cosmetic surgery and in the main, it is for vital cases. However they also fund (in my opinion) trivial operations including sex changes which run into the tens of thousands of pounds. Sorry, we'd like to move you up the hip replacement queue but we spent the dough on turning Andrew into Andrea.

My main gripe with living in the UK is that I feel my freedoms are comprimised and a system has evolved that positively discrimenates against those who wish to better themselves and be successful.

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