JEREMY CLARKSON AND JONATHON ROSS ARE ON A PICKET LINE.
JEREMY
So the politically correct, eco-twerps in charge of the BBC think they cut the pay of their biggest stars! They think they can run our pay down like a boy racer in a Mercedes S Class running down a pensioner on a Zebra crossing.
JONATHON
Which is why we're on strike! No funny with out money!
JEREMY
Yes Jonathon until they make with the readies I'll be doing nothing on Top Gear but sensible reporting on estates cars and penis shaped, electric cars.
JONATHON
You monster Jeremy. Well until they gurantee me the 5 million I need to live, I'll be politely interviewing my guests and not banging on about myself for the whole show.
JEREMY
We've got the country by the short and curlies, they won't be able to go a week with out hilarious antics.
JONATHON
Hang on who's approaching our picket line? Strike breakers?
JEREMY
But who? I'm as unique as a bicycle on Top Gear.
THEY ARE APROACHED BY JAQUI SMITH AND HAZEL BLEARS.
JAQUI SMITH
Now that I've resigned from government I can present Top Gear.
HAZEL BLEARS
With me we're used to taking the public for a ride.