I'm not sure if this the place to post it but I know some of us (i.e. me) struggle with getting the punchline right sometimes.
This one popped into my head yesterday which made me wonder about us posting a few random ones. Anyone could then have a go at writing a sketch to fit one of them. Or not...
"And it was only when he asked me to have sex with the Alsation that I thought it might not be Simon Cowell after all."
Anyone else?
Jx
If you're not Susan Boyle, then what is that on Piers's neck?
I may be a penguin but I'm also a communist.
Gordon Brown is going down going down, what a wanker.
Of I killed her it's a Tuesday.
Of course any decent punchline is sketch specific.
Quote: Jane P @ June 4 2009, 9:38 AM BST"And it was only when he asked me to have sex with the Alsation that I thought it might not be Simon Cowell after all."
I can see that in a monologue.
Quote: sootyj @ June 4 2009, 9:42 AM BSTOf course any decent punchline is sketch specific.
I know Soots - I was just being lazy (and trying to attract boys). I thought they'd be fun and abstract to read though - as was your penguin one.
Thanks Dolly, I hope we get to work together on a monologue sometime soon (if that's not a contradiction in terms).
Sounds like a line from a literary porn film.
Makes me think this could be an idea for a Fast Show-esque returning vox-pop style sketch character. A woman in her fifties in the street talking to an unseen interviewer, who we cut to periodically just as she's finishing a bizarre story concerning a celebrity.
eg:
WOMAN:
...and it was only then that the penny dropped and I said "I know that's you Mr Barrymore, now kindly get out of my loft and stop fiddling with my husband's pigeons!"
or something.
Oh dear this is what Laura Solon was asking for, close the flood gates!
Quote: Lee Henman @ June 4 2009, 10:32 AM BSTMakes me think this could be an idea for a Fast Show-esque returning vox-pop style sketch character. A woman in her fifties in the street talking to an unseen interviewer, who we cut to periodically just as she's finishing a bizarre story concerning a celebrity.
eg:
WOMAN:
...and it was only then that the penny dropped and I said "I know that's you Mr Barrymore, now kindly get out of my loft and stop fiddling with my husband's pigeons!"or something.
Excellent idea. (Even if it's been done before!). More!
Quote: Jane P @ June 4 2009, 9:38 AM BST"And it was only when he asked me to have sex with the Alsation that I thought it might not be Simon Cowell after all."
Punchline or set up?
e.g. "No that was Simon... no wonder you burst into tears during your performance."
Quote: Timbo @ June 4 2009, 12:55 PM BSTPunchline or set up?
e.g. "No that was Simon... no wonder you burst into tears during your performance."
'So he needed an operation to remove the snowglobe.'
...well it's eating my popcorn.
...I'm no Nazi but enough's enough.
...you thought she smelled bad when she was alive.
...I know any port in a storm, but 'cmonthat's too much.
So thats the worse that could happen.
It didn't look like a used one I must say.
That's funny, it worked for me.
Oh God, I'm really sorry...I shouldn't have broken your arms...can't believe it, there really was someone called King Cnut...
Christ! It's a f**king pineapple!