SCENE1
3 GOATS STAND ON A BRIDGE
LITTLEST GOAT
But I swear he was there under the bridge, he threatened to eat me and everything.
BIGGEST GOAT
Really so where is the Troll who hides under the bridge?
MIDDLEST GOAT
I'm sick of his fibs lets kick his head in.
SCENE2
HARRY POTTER AND RON WEASLEY SIT BOREDLY ON THE FLOOR
HARRY
So where is he? Isn't he supposed to be helping guard the Philosopher's Stone?
RON
I dunno maybe he missed the bus.
HARRY
Do you ever feel funny when you're with Hermione?
RON
Euurrgghh no that's disgusting Harry. I like Dobby.
SCENE3
BILBO BAGGINS CAREFULLY EXMAINES A CAMP SITE WITH GANDALF.
BILBO
Where are they?
GANDALF
I dunno, so what are we going to do about this thing going on between us.
PATS BILBOS HEAD AFFECTIONATELY.
SCENE4
THE OLOGHAI, THE CAVE TROLLS AND THE BRIDGE TROLL ARE ALL GATHERED AROUND A COMPUTER.
CAVETROLL (FROM THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE)
Reeaarrgghh bloooaaarrrggghh!
CAVETROLL
Roaarrgghh! I am going to pretend to work for the BBC.
BRIDGE TROLL
Let's type a satire.
CAVETROLL
CAVE TROLL
Smart arse.
