I'm a big fat stinking knob cheese monger.
Photo canvas
That's all very well, but did you think Red Dwarf was as good after Rob Grant left the writing team at the end of series 6?
Yeah, and where do you stand on Stewart Lee.
I prefer the neck.
I genuinely envy anyone who can refer to eight years of 'transforming photos to canvas prints' as 'glorious'. To me, that sounds like a new circle of hell but to you, it's 'glorious'. Long may you continue your 'glorious' career. You idiot.
Funniest thing I've read in ages. You should write stand up.
Why don't you just be honest and leave out the boring crap about pictures and say I want to use the forum as a link farm and here is my one way link to try and get me noticed on Google.
Won't do your link popularity much good though as it's not even a relevant link and Aaron can just edit the post to impliment a no-follow rule making it useless for Google anyway.
Hate losers who think spamming forums will get them to page 1 in Google.
It wont! Read a book and try to learn something about SEO. My book 
Hi Beneet
Welcome to BSG! I'm Morrace; I live happily with my wife who lovingly refers to me as "a f**kin' insect-brained dickhead." I love her to bits. She often flies into a rage down the pub when she gets off her pretty little face. On St Patrick's Day, she called the barman a 'filthy bollock-licking cock-gobbling gobshite!' He retaliated by calling her a 'disgusting cock -sucking rectal tart!'- I had to laugh.
I hope to see a lot of your stuff posted soon, Beneet. I haven't posted much lately myself because I get so distracted by tracking down the sinister forces that control my life. Also, my long-lost sister decided to spring a month-long visit on me and the Mrs. And don't get me started on those pills that nice Eastern European lady sold me - I am so out of it sometimes! Suddenly, out of nowhere, I've developed this sudden love for thumping, banging, in-your-face trance/techno/dance music - it's f**kin' brilliant - and me a life-long Vera Lynn fan (until I took the pills). Anyway, I hope my new meditation program helps and I can get down and do some serious writing.
Sounds like a great pub Morrace. Will have to go there sometime.
Have been banned from most of the pubs where I live for showing my arse too often.
What is it that makes the English decide to table dance when abroad?
Quote: hey_nonny @ May 1 2009, 11:28 AM BSTWhat is it that makes the English decide to table dance when abroad?
Anonymity, booze, Ecstasy, Cocaine, Bravado (new Spanish drug), Ketamine, GHB, GBL, BBC (documentary crews encouraging them to so, that is.) - er - that's it.
.
Quote: Nil Putters @ May 1 2009, 9:30 AM BST
I prefer the neck.
Brill.
Quote: hey_nonny @ May 1 2009, 10:19 AM BSTHate losers who think spamming forums will get them to page 1 in Google.
It wont! Read a book and try to learn something about SEO. My book
What's it called?
SEO zaubertricks. Wrote it in German.
Roughly translated: Search Engine Optimization Magic Tricks.
More of a comprehensive idiots manual on how to get to top of Google it's about 6 months old now so already out of date. Problem is when you are good at getting sites to the top of Google all your mates and their mates and those peoples mates all want you to get their sites to the top too and for free. Got pissed off with them all thinking I have unlimited free time so now tell them all "just read my book". Tight fisted wankers.
Write it in English and send me a copy.
Quote: Aaron @ May 1 2009, 11:26 PM BSTWrite it in English and send me a copy.
No.
Thanks Aaron, you asking for an English translation of my book has just made me come up with a cunning plan. Will write a new book in English and send you a copy when it's done, will take a while though.
Most friends who want me to get them to the top of Google have no idea about web design or computers and their sites are really tacky or they don't even have a site yet and want me to do that too (for free). The new book will be an absolute idiots guide on what makes a site look great or shit, and will include all Open Source software needed on CD to create any kind of site, forums, web-shop, homepage etc.. and graphics with idiot proof step by step instructions/guides on how to acheive that great site using the software provided on the CD.
It will then show them how to get this new site to the top of Google within a month.
Will even try to make it funny
Hate this boring techy crap, but suppose you ought to do what you are best at and it looks like writing comedy isn't one of my better talents. 