A man and a woman both in medical face masks run onto stage.
They both pull off their masks, and sound heavily out of breath.
Man: I think we lost him!
Woman : Are we safe here?
Man: Yeah, my Mum keeps a clean house.
Woman: I can't believe it! Two weeks of isolation and who knocks on the door but a Mexican pig farmer.
Man: He might not have been infected though.
Woman: Well, he just looked like he was going to sneeze.
Man: Darling, How did you know he was Mexcian Pig farmer? After all he wasn't wearing a sombrero and offering us pork chops was he?
Woman: To be honest I didn't. But I wasn't going to hang around, just in case.
Man: So How does the infection spread?
Woman: I believe it comes from brushing against the skin of a pig.
Man: Really? I thought it was to do with ( LOOKS AROUND ) sexual contact.
Woman: Look I don't really know, but Dave down the pub said all packets of pork scratchings have been recalled.
Man: I think this might be the work of Al Quaeda
Woman: Why?
Man: Muslim's! They don't eat Pork based products, there are no pigs in their countries. It could be a clever scheme to wipe out all us infidels.
Woman: Don't be so stupid! That's crazy.
The door bell rings. Man answers. Osama Bin Laden is at the door, holding a sandwich.
Bin Laden : Good Morning Sir, Can I interest you in one of Osama's Bacon Butties?
