Alistair Darling walks into Gordon Brown's Office.
AD : Morning Gordie!
A loud mooing sound is heard from outside.
GB: What the f**k was that Darling?
AD: My new plan to raise us some cash.
GB: A cow?
AD : No Gordie. It's a bull.
GB: This better not be a shit related plan Alistair!
AD: No, nothing like that – It's sperm related!
GB: For f**ks sake!
AD: Bear with me. I was reading my monthly copy of Dairy Farmers Weekly last night.
GB: Essential reading for any Chancellor.
AD: Indeed! Did you know there is a world wide shortage of bull seamen?
GB: Surprising enough Darling, I didn't.
AD: Well prices have sky rocketed. Supply and demand you see. A pint of prize winning bull spunk sells for £35,000!
GB: Bloody Hell!
AD: So I bought 20 bulls. They're all in the garden. If we can get each one to produce two pints of spunk a day that's worth £1.4 million!
GB: How are they supposed to produce so much Darling?
AD: We have this milk bottle and then we give them a helping hand, if you know what I mean!
GB: How many times does each bull have to crank one off to get our two pints?
AD: About twenty.
GB: So we've got to get someone in to wank off twenty bulls twenty times a day?
AD: Yes. I asked around and we came up with the perfect person for the job.
GB: Who?
AD: Someone with a lot of experience in this field.<beat> Jacqui Smith's husband!