I'm interested to hear what excuses you would give to the press / Jacqui Smith. I'll kick off with –
'What with the credit crunch, I'm helping to keep porn stars in work'.
>_<
Jacqui Smith
"I'm a vile harridan and so my husband has to get off to mucky movies."
Funniest story I've heard all week. "mmmmmm 60 terra bytes of barely legal porn...yes that seems like something the public should pay for, it's essenstail for me to do my job."
I might be bending the truth there, but I'm practicing to write for the sun.
Surely nobody who writes for The Sun has ever practised! 
Quote: Gavin @ March 31 2009, 5:42 PM BSTFunniest story I've heard all week. "mmmmmm 60 terra bytes of barely legal porn...yes that seems like something the public should pay for, it's essenstail for me to do my job."
60 Terra Bytes!!!??
Amateur.
Hey Julia ready here I'm gonna write the headline.
"WANT FREE PORN? BECOME AN MP!"
Thats right not happy with letting foreigners come in and rape our economy and women MP's have now turned their attention to our porn.
Quote: Gavin @ March 31 2009, 5:51 PM BSTThats right not happy with letting foreigners come in and rape our economy and women MP's have now turned their attention to our porn.
That sounds more like The Daily Mail than The Sun. 
Quote: Nil Putters @ March 31 2009, 5:53 PM BSTThat sounds more like The Daily Mail than The Sun.
Aren't they the same thing?
Honourable member given stiff warning.
Too predictable? A bit lowest common denominator? Yes.
Quote: Balf @ March 31 2009, 6:03 PM BSTHonourable member given stiff warning.
Too predictable? A bit lowest common denominator? Yes.
The films were undoubtably the shite you get on Cable/Sky porn anyway. Softcore rubbish. Fancy being busted watching them!
Black Rod won't be impressed.
Quote: Nil Putters @ March 31 2009, 6:11 PM BSTThe films were undoubtably the shite you get on Cable/Sky porn anyway. Softcore rubbish. Fancy being busted watching them!
Black Rod won't be impressed.
Nil Porn connoisseur
Imagine the fuss if he'd been caught watching some proper hardcore rumpy pumpy!
Quote: Nil Putters @ March 31 2009, 6:16 PM BST
like 'The Sure Shag Redemtion'. In b&w, because it's not completely tackless