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INT. LIVING ROOM

A TV ANTIQUES DEALER IS LOOKING AT A LOVEHEART NECKLACE

ANTIQUES DEALER
This is a wonderful piece could you tell me a bit about it?

CONTESTANT
Well that is very very precious to me, its been in my family for a number of years. It was first owned by my great grandmother. She was giving it by my great grandfather who said as long as she had the necklace she would always have his heart.

ANTIQUES DEALER
That's wonderful

CONTESTANT
He was then tragically killed in World War One and when by great grandmother passed away she handed it to my grandfather. My grandfather then gave it to my grandma.
He said as long as she had it their love could never be broken.

ANTIQUES DEALER
What a wonderful family heirloom

CONTESTANT
My Grandma was killed during the blitz and this was all that survived from the house. My father actually found it as he searched through the rubble.

ANTIQUES DEALER
How terribly sad

CONTESTANT
I never really knew my father, he was murdered while travelling the world. Him and his travelling partner were set upon my local gangsters and when my father refused to hand over the necklace they shot him and left him for dead.
His travel partner was with him as he died and his last wish was for me to have the necklace so it has huge sentimental value.

ANTIQUES DEALER
Well you are probably not interested in my offer of £100 then

CONTESTANT
sold

Good joke, maybe the build up is too long though?

Nope build up was great. Make it look like he's trying to milk for more money. Liked it.

Who is that a picture of?

This sketch reminded me of a scene from Pulp Fiction, where Christopher Walken's character, talks about a watch being passed down the family, and to keep it safe, they all hid it in their asses.

Quote: Leevil @ March 22 2009, 7:33 PM GMT

This sketch reminded me of a scene from Pulp Fiction, where Christopher Walken's character, talks about a watch being passed down the family, and to keep it safe, they all hid it in their asses.

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Hence the picture of Christopher Walken in said film, in said role?

Said.

Hey I like that. Agree that the build up length is necessary though I think the price should be really shit, like £10 or £20.

Nice. For me, the build up is what makes this work work. It's the same structure as an old banoffee pie joke. A comedian (I forget who)tells it on an extra of The Aristocrats I think. There's a monstrous, top heavy build up about a man travelling the world in search of this perfect pie then, when he finally finds a shop that sells it he's told it's out of stock. "F**k it, I'll have the cherry then" he says.