British Comedy Guide

Razor Blade advert

SHOUTY MALE VOICE

"And now - new from Swordette. The razor with the closest shave ever - The Blade 20. 20 Blades to give you your closest shave ever. Comes complete with titanium nose guard to prevent those little accidents plus lip protector".

Very good. Can i have one for my daddy. Minus the nose guard and lip protector. I want a stanley knife razor. Daddy has been very mean and not giving me the money i requested for a vroom vrooooooooom.

Liked it David. Gave me the gigles.

I agree David, where will they stop, first one blade, then two, then three and just to counteract any razors in the pipeline from their biggest rival Gillette jump to 5 (with an extra one on the back)! You are right, will it stop at just 20 though! - how about a razor in the shape of your face with blades just a fraction of a millimetre apart and with one downward movement the whole lot is taken off. And what's with the 'battery operated' ones!!!? - my hand is more than capable of making those difficult moves all by itself thank-you very much.

Those battery operated ones are weird. They feel odd. I reckon in a few years people will be suing Gillette because they've got vibration white finger.

I thought for the millennium they'd release a souvenior 1000 blade monster. Let's face it, if they keep adding anymore blades they'll be sloughing off flesh and bone.

I can imagine a advert where a scientist says "this really is the closest shave ever" then we have some footage of david beckham shaving the skin on his face off, then some footage of him with bandages on his face and plasters, "look not a hair left on his face" is this reality, is it the future or do i just want to shave beckhams face off?

1000 blade slougher. Isn't that a bacon slicer?

Being a 40-year beard wearer I reckon I've already saved myself 1,200 hours of this early morning shaving nonsense!! I don't ever have to do anything life threatening with, of all things, a razor, when I'm at my most vulnerable (i.e. still half asleep!). The down side is that, being a smoker (yes, I know, disgusting habit, etc.!!) I've accidently set fire to it a couple of times ... once in front of a bunch of people I was supposed to be doing a presentation to in my old day job. They seemed to find it amusing!
Personally I feel sorry for the ladies who seem to prefer pulling anything that vaguely resembles a facial hair out one at a time. If blokes did that they'd never get to work!

Where do you wear your beard Losaavedra?

Uhm, on the front of my head! Or do you mean where am I (with my head!)? Latter is in my profile. Hey, I know Carshalton quite well ... even a musician who lived there, maybe still does, who played bass with Mayall for a bit. They did a concert at Carshalton long ago. Great night!

Who's that then - and where did they play? A pub? Not much else in Carshalton. I was trying to be funny about "wearing" a beard. Obviously didn't work though.

Was it Carshalton-something-Hall. CouldĀ“ve been 'Town' (doesn't sound right) or 'Village' (neither does that) or somesuch ... fairly big place as I remember. This was somewhere between 1969 and 1972 (when I was between wives and celebrating my then freedom!). The bass player was Keith Tillman, the Carshalton session is on one of the Mayall LPs. Earlier Keith and I were in the same blues gig band playing around the S. London area. Matthew Fisher was in that thrown together band as well, he lived in S. Croydon then. Brilliant blues keyboard player ... he's the guy playing keyboard on Whiter Shade of Pale when he went to Procul Harum shortly after. Better stop this as its very Off Topic and sooner or later someone will scrub it! Carry this on via email if you want, some of us were involved in doing a musical too back then, called 'Why' ... very dated stuff now, these days there are different 'issues' to write lyrics about. Sorry for the missed 'funny' ... that's the trouble with humour ... it can sometimes be hard to figure out whether something's supposed to be jokey or otherwise just from the typed 'words' ... bit like comedy scripts I guess!?!

Later: It came to me this morning ... that Mayall concert could well've been in Wallington .. whoops! ... brain death through lack of face shaving!

Yes - probably Wallington just down the road but closer to where I live is the Boom Boom Club at Sutton United. Among others including Focus I've seen John Otway there this year ... who EVERYONE here should see at least once in their life.

Incidentally I've just seen an ad for a womens razor Venus 3 I think which has batteries and vibrates - 2 for the price of 1.

That is a very good deal, the venus 2 didn't do me legs as well as waxing them, and now it vibrates, whats next ribbed for the womans pleasure.

I can see my son in 20 years time struggling to pick up his 17 blade razor, when will they think of the children?

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