Another 7 on 7 lost cause

ART AND ARTIFICE

Reporter: So what's next for Magnugs? Are you planning to break any more barriers, or windows?

Magnugs: I'm always on the lookout for the next opportunity to share my art.

Reporter: In your last piece you smashed out the window of a subway car and spray painted all over the outside of it. What do you say to the people who call that vandalism?

Magnugs: How can I be a Vandal, when the Vandals lived so long ago?

Reporter: Are we ready? Yes. We're going to follow Magnugs through a typical day and watch him create.

Magnugs: There's a coffee shop up here. I feel a piece coming.

Reporter: You said "piece", right?

EFFECTS: Door opening, people talking

Magnugs: That sandwich looks good.

Old Lady: Oh, my! Excuse me, young man, that's my lunch you're eating!

Magnugs: (chewing) That's called "Scarfing an Old Biddy's Sandwich." Shows the hunger that old people have for life and sandwiches.

Old Lady: I don't believe it! That little knob just stole my lunch!

EFFECTS: Opening of door, street noises

Magnugs: Let's go into this greeting card shop.

EFFECTS: Opening of door, music playing

Magnugs: This is about the commercialization of human sentiment. The best way to express outrage at this… lack of taste- is to wee all over the Anniversary, Get Well & Sympathy cards. Here I go.

EFFECTS: Sound of zipper ,Sound of fluid spraying.

Reporter: Oh…my…god. He's really doing it!

Card shop Employee: Hey! What the hell do you think your doing? I'm calling the police!

EFFECTS: Sound of zipper, running footsteps, door opening

Employee: (fading) Oi! Wanker! Get back here!

Magnugs: (panting) It's the…way of the…artist…Always moving forward…like a shark-

Reporter: -Chased by police.

EFFECTS: Street noises, door opening

Magnugs: We'll hide in this pub-no- I mean we'll explore anonymity. Sure am thirsty. That man's pint offers an opportunity for art.

EFFECTS: Sound of drinking

Magnugs: Ah! How refreshing! I call that "A Thirst for Life."

EFFECTS: Sound of a chair moving across a wooden floor.

Large man: (deep, gravelly, tones) I call that "A Death Wish."

EFFECTS: Sound of a punch and a body hitting the floor.

Reporter: And we're out.

THE END

That's really good and a lovely idea well characterised and very well suited to radio.

But it's funny and pbvious enough not to need so much intro. Also I think your punch would work better if the journalist phrased it like a work of art as well.

But that's a top sketch.

I agree with sooty, a very funny sketch. Well done.

I liked the premise and there are some funny lines here, it just felt a bit stretched to me, perhaps because it's hard to satirise this kind of behaviour as it self-satirises.

I read it, and didn't understand what the f**k was going on.

Then I found the news story and read that. Then read this again, and it made a lot more sense! So, in the respect of a topical sketch show, it needs a bit of introduction to the story so that people like me (ie uninformed by the story) know what's going on!

That said, the sketch was very good. I think the ending needs a bit more of a twist (like Sooty's suggestion), but good work.

Dan