This got me absolutely nowhere.
(PETER MANDELSON AND RICHARD BRANSON DISCUSS THE SELLING OFF OF THE ROYAL MAIL.)
F/XOUND OF DRINKS BEING POURED.
MANDELSON:
So, Richard, you want to buy the 30% share in the Royal Mail.
BRANSON:
30%. I want to buy all of the Royal Mail.
MANDELSTON:
You won't be allowed to re-badge it as Virgin Mail, you know.
BRANSON:
Royal Mail is fine. I'm pretty much royalty, anyway.
MANDELSTON:
That's brilliant, then. We can use the money to bail out the banks and shore up the Royal Mail pension fund.
BRANSON:
You'd better stuff an extra 20 million pounds in the pension fund for me. I'll want a nice pension out of it when it all goes tits up.
MANDELSTON:
I may have some problems getting this past Parliament. Some people think of you as a shameless self- publicist.
BRANSON:
(innocent) Me?
MANDELSTON:
So, I can assure Parliament that you aren't buying the Royal Mail simply for self-aggrandisement and to enhance your public profile.
BRANSON:
I just want to give the people of Great Britain the best possible postal service.
MANDELSTON:
What are you doing? Why do you keep turning your face left to right in that mirror?
BRANSON:
I'm looking at my profiles. What do you think? Should I be looking to the left or to the right on the new Royal Mail stamps?