British Comedy Guide

Speak Easy

INT. MEDICAL CENTRE RECEPTION – DAY

A MAN ENTERS AND WALKS UP TO THE RECEPTIONIST

RECEPTIONIST:
Good morning, sir. How can I help you?

MAN (IN THICK GEORDIE ACCENT. AND HE MUMBLES)
Ah've got ahn appointment, like.

RECEPTIONIST:
And what's your appointment for, sir?

MAN:
Elaacuutiaan

RECEPTIONIST (POINTING):
Through the double doors and then first on your right

CUT TO:

MAN COMES BACK THROUGH RECEPTION. HIS FACE IS BLACKENED AND HIS HAIR IS FRAZZLED, STANDING ON END.

RECEPTIONIST:
Better, sir?

MAN (NOW SPEAKING WITH RECEIVED PRONUNCIATION):
Better? Better? I came here for speech therapy, not to get bloody fried.

RECEPTIONIST:
Ahh. Sorry. Thought you were here for the electrocution therapy. You should have spoken a bit clearer. Like you are now.

MAN:
Bah! Amateur! (WALKS OUT)

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