TO THE TUNE OF ON TOP OF OLD SMOKEY
If you are a smoker
Then you will well know
That you will be subject
To an existence of woe
And now doctors tell us
If you are obese
That you will die early
From arteriole grease
And if you are like me
And drink once a day
You're at risk from cancer
And liver decay
So I would advise you
To not drink or smoke
And just to be careful
Don't sleep around with folk
If you give up those bad things
Perhaps over Lent
You might find more time
Staying at work is spent
But the strange thing is - And I
Don't want to incense ya
If you work long hours
You're at risk of dementia
So if you're a fat smoker
Don't go get upset
Just go drink and work hard
And soon you will forget.
Excellent 
