Quote: Lee Henman @ January 17 2009, 7:23 PM GMTJohnny comes back from school crying and says, "Mummy, all the kids in the school say I have a big head."
His mother replies, "No you don't Johnny. You have a hideously deformed head. The other children are merely hiding the truth to protect your feelings."
Q: Why was six afraid of seven?
A: It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear."Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bob."
"Oh, come in."Three women are on an plane. One's a blonde, ones a red head, one's a brunette. Unfortunately, the plane was going to crash and there was nothing they could do but jump out and parachute to safety. So the captain said to each of the three ladies, "You can only take one of your possessions when you parachute out of the plane." The blonde says "I will take my watch becau-" But before she could finish her sentence the plane exploded because the flames on the wing had ignited the fuel tank. No one survived.
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Now these made me straight up laugh out london.
Boy George handcuffed and assaulted a male escort.
Did he really want to hurt him.
The courts seem to think so he's about to begin a 15 month prison sentence.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
No reason as it lacked the senciense to concieve of it actions on an incident by incident basis.