First attempt at a topical song

Here's a first draft of a topical song. I have only tried one before (about Obama's Grandma). The formating is to cock but the first line of each chorus is Brown speaking to Olmet and the rest are him reporting Olmet's response. Hope that makes some sense.

Gordon Calls Ehud Olmet
(To the tune of Rehab by Amy Winehouse)

I'm on the phone to Ehud Olmert shouting Woah! Woah! Woah!
He say Hamas pissed me off now & they gonna know, know, know
It's Christmas time and George Bush he says it's fine
Everyone else is on holiday so we're gonna go, go, go

Journalists can stay away
I can promise it's you it's okay
Cause there's nothing
There's nothing here to see
We're just making terror go away

It's peace we want you see
That's why we're sending the army

I ask him for a total cease-fire. But he say No! No! No!
We're fighting back against their attack Yo! Yo! Yo!
They killed a few of mine, so I'm gonna flatten Palestine
Santa's got a sack of payback for Christmas! Ho! Ho! Ho!

Why did you send Blair here?
Really! He's got no idea
Just show him, show him any dossier
Whisper '45 minutes' in his ear
He'll say 'I think it's for the best'
That you lay thousands to their rest

I told him that we wouldn't take it. But he said Woah! Woah! Woah!
You give us flak but you won't do Jack. No! No! No!
Your moralising's fine, but that's where you draw the line
So don't pretend you'll choose the A-rabs 'cos we say Ho! Ho! Ho!

I can't do songs for love nor money. I can't get my poor feeble brain around scanning and silli-bulls and the like. So can't comment on any of that.

I think you may have chosen a hard song, because of the No,No,No's at the end of each line of the chorus. This limits the words you can have which causes quite a few repeats.

If you are planning on sending to NR/T I would think you need to drop the Christmas refs.

Hopefully someone else can comment on the technical stuff for you.

It's good and a good match it made me smile, but the Christmas references maybe a hard sell.

That said Gordy as Ami is such an intrinsically funny idea it might still be a winner.

Thanks guys. I think this has definitely passed it's sell by date particularly with the cease(ish) fire. I'm just trying to get my head round the form really. I agree that it's a particularly difficult song to work with, but once I had it in my head I couldn't shake it.