I have told this joke a couple of times at stand up nights and its gone well however feel my punchline is not strong enough.
It is a long storytelling gag but the short version goes like this -
Me and the wife should be paid not to go on decent holidays as when we do something terible happens.
Cuba 97' - princess Diana died
South Africa 2002' - Sept 11th attacks
Egypt 2005 - Hurrican Katrina
and last year we went to Mexico AND.......
The whole fabric of the economy starts to fall apart - simply because my wife's credit cards weren't in the country.
??????
Mexico however is enjoying a boom period!!!!
Oooo, Griff has got it I think. Yep, something celeb and pointless.
Why didn't I think of that? Yeap Griff wins
II've used new kids of the block reformed as well as another punchline.
It worked well its just with a long, long set up was after another angle on it.
Thanks Griff either great minds think alike or its a bit obvious and we both know its the first one 
Nobody waved?
...this gig happened. Thanks a LOT, Mexico.
Or...
I think this year we're gonna have two weeks in (insert name of RIVAL TOWN here), give the world a break.
...she came with me.
...George Bush shows excellent reflexes. I mean c'mon I know everything else goes over his head but once... juuust once, wouldn't it have been great to finally see him get it?!
John Wayne's ghost f**ked my wife in revenge for the Alamo.
Last year we went to an Al Qaeda training camp in Afghanistan, the entertainment was alright but the food was awful. I mean a man can only eat so much goat.
...my baby was born a cold slug of dead flesh?
My wife got anally probed by aliens and I was arrested for rape and sodomy.
'...I got the shits.'
'..i forget to set an answering machine message.'
Go trivial on those muthas.