http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7813114.stm
The Queen and Prince Philip are sitting in bed. The Queen is reading the Times and Philip is reading Playboy.
Queen : Phily baby. I've been thinking.
Philip : You be careful Liz, you'll get all excited again. Last time that happened we ended up with Edward.
Queen : (giggling) I've think the time has past for that Phily. No I've been thinking, with the country in such a poor state maybe we should give up the civil list and go out and work.
Philip : Give up the civil list? We bloody work our arses off for that Liz. Where the hell would we get jobs anyway? – Andrew stands no sodding chance, Wollies has closed now.
Queen : No wait. People are going to get pretty pissed off with us over the coming months if we aren't seen to be sharing the sacrifice.
Philip : Well we don't want a peasants' revolt on our hands do we. What do you suggest?
Queen: Look, I think it's pretty easy. The boys are already in the services. Eddie can go back to his film work, Anne can be a farrier and Andy must have got his golf handicap down enough to turn professional.
Philip : He might win the open. (giggling)
Queen : Charles can be a horticulturist.
Philip : He certainly is a cu...
Queen : Language Philip.
Philip : What about us?
Queen : Well with your sense of tack I thought you could join the diplomatic service.
Philip : That's true. Maybe I could sort out the bloody middle east?
Philip turns the magazine around. And makes face.
Queen : And I thought I might take up glamour modelling
Philip : Yes. (PAUSE) What?
Queen : I might get some chuffing attention then.
They both go back behind their reading material. Philip then puts his magazine down.
Philip : Hang on, we don't have a job for Camilla yet?
Queen shows Philip her newspaper.
Queen : No problem (PAUSE)look, scientists are looking for more brain donors.