Opening scene to a sitcom

Thanks for feedback

Mmm sandwich board.

I liked it, but then again, I like you.

Having only one scene to go on it's obviously difficult, as I don't know how it develops from here,but it certainly reads well and is gently amusing. The original ad with machete is probably the biggest laugh in the scene and a nice visual piece, I can see that being very funny.

I know your stuff is quite low key and naturalistic in general, or at least from what I've seen, and that kind of style often takes time to build rather than being crazy funny from the off,but I certainly think you need to get another big laugh in there within the first thirty seconds or so, to really kick start the pilot.

Good stuff though, I liked it.

I think I agree Stott, I'm gonna tighten it and try and get in another big laugh early on. Thanks for the feedback.