Beef

SC1. INT - DINING ROOM - EVENING

A MAN WALKS UP TO THE CARVERY AND APPROACHES THE CHEF.

CHEF
Yes and what'll it be then?

MAN:
Just some beef please

THE CHEF CARVES THREE NICE SLICES OF BEEF. VERY RARE

CHEF:
There you go sir.

MAN:
Is this dead then?

CHEF:
Oh yeah well gone sir. James Herriot couldn't do sod all with that.

MAN:
But it's all so final...isn't it?

CHEF:
It is sir. It is, a crying shame and no mistake. But that's just the way it is. One minute you're strolling round a field munching on God's good green grass and the next you're the star turn of an all you can eat for £7.99 carvery.

MAN:
In that case I think I'll have the chicken. I hate chickens! One shat on me when I was training for the Priesthood. The bastard.

I laughed... yet I don't know why just imagine the man saying "I was training for the Priesthood. The bastard."

Oh not that Im putting down the sketch the sketch is great

That sure did tickle me. I love it when i can have a good ol' belly laugh like that. Its an excuse to fondle myself and get away with it infront of the family.
I feel FaNtAbUlOuS now. Yet very tired. Phwoooooooooooooooooooooar

Thanks Paul and Charley

This is rather weird.

I sat down at the keyboard and my idea was to write a bad sketch and see what sort of response it got.

It took precisely the length of time it took to type it and I had no idea about what it was to be about two minutes before it was done.

I laughed out loud too when I read it back but f***ed if I know why.

Spooky.

CUE OUTER LIMITS THEME

i liked this one more than the other sketch.
well done

i liked this one more than the other sketch.
well done

Change 'man' to 'priest' and it's a winner for me! If that's bad, I'd love to see the good. Quality, Mr Bllenkinsop.

Fagyewverymushindeed

Quote: Blenkinsop @ March 23, 2007, 7:07 PM

I hate chickens! One shat on me when I was training for the Priesthood. The bastard.

View original

Oh I see. Can't think of anything original so you half inch one of the Pope's after dinner jokes, eh. It's not clever, it's not right but it is funny.