What's your favourite one liner that you have written? Could be in a drama or a comedy.
And a one liner can be someone's reply to a question in my lexicon.
One Liners
Mine was the following one word response.
{Dan has been boasting about some achievement.}
DAN: Anyone got a number for The Guinness Book of Records?
JANE: Infinity?
Quote: JohnnyD @ December 5 2008, 5:46 PM GMTMine was the one word reply to a question.
"Infinity."
"What's 1 divided by zero?" was obviously what others consider to be my best one liner. 
Quote: Griff @ December 5 2008, 6:05 PM GMTSorry Marc, but it wouldn't be fair to all my other brilliant one liners to single one out.
that's a cracker!
Quote: Badge @ December 5 2008, 6:07 PM GMT
It's the way he tells 'em!
My fave -
Muhammed Ali being interviewed and told by the interviewer
"Hey I saw Sonny Liston yesterday" (The world champ,Ali was due to face)
To which he replied
"Aint he ugly?"
Quote: Daddy Maz @ December 5 2008, 6:47 PM GMTMy fave -
Muhammed Ali being interviewed and told by the interviewer
"Hey I saw Sonny Liston yesterday" (The world champ,Ali was due to face)
To which he replied
"Aint he ugly?"
Were you credited?
I don't know about favourite, but a recent one:
TONY:
I want it checked - in fact I want more checks than Petr Cech's checkbook in the pocket of his checked jacket at the checkout.
JANICE:
Check.
In a recent sitcom wot I wrote:
(BOZ HAS NICKED A LOAD OF NHS STUFF FROM THE RECYCLING CENTRE AND IS TAKING IT OUT OF A BINLINER, ONE ITEM AT A TIME AND SHOWING IT TO GILLY. THERE'S A REPLACEMENT HIP, A PACEMAKER, FALSE TEETH ETC.)
GILLY:
Will you stop cluttering my counter up with all this shite, it looks like a bomb's gone off in a pension queue!
Quote: Lee Henman @ December 5 2008, 9:57 PM GMTIn a recent sitcom wot I wrote:
(BOZ HAS NICKED A LOAD OF NHS STUFF FROM THE RECYCLING CENTRE AND IS TAKING IT OUT OF A BINLINER, ONE ITEM AT A TIME AND SHOWING IT TO GILLY. THERE'S A REPLACEMENT HIP, A PACEMAKER, FALSE TEETH ETC.)
GILLY:
Will you stop cluttering my counter up with all this shite, it looks like a bomb's gone off in a pension queue!
I like it
Fair play to Lee for playing properly, but then his agent's receptionist has a well posh voice! 
Quote: Marc P @ December 5 2008, 10:39 PM GMTFair play to Lee for playing properly, but then his agent's receptionist has a well posh voice!
Are you talking about Holly? When did you speak to her?
I spoke to someone and she sounded posher than a cucumber sandwich with the crusts removed!
Quote: Marc P @ December 5 2008, 10:49 PM GMTI spoke to someone and she sounded posher than a cucumber sandwich with the crusts removed!
It's an act, they're all from Bootle really.
from my 1996 play....
'are you wired up to a candy bar or something?'