British Comedy Guide

Nazi police.

HITLER AND A POLICE OFFICER ARE STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER.

JAQUI SMITH WALKS ON.

JAQUI

Right we've reason to believe there are members of the BNP in the police. The police is no place for Nazis, no seriously it isn't. So I've got some questions for you 'orrible lot.

What do you say to a Black man in a BMW?

POLICE

Cor sir nice wheels!

JAQUI

You'd judge him on the car he drives? You Nazi.

ADOLF

Achtung Panzer!

JAQUI

Right you see a woman in a burqa struggling with her shopping.

POLICE

Good morning mam, can I help with your shopping?

JAQUI

Good morning? Good morning? Her whole family might be in Guantanomo Bay you patronising Nazi.

ADOLF

Sieg heil!

JAQUI

Right PC Ivor Truncheon you're fired you racist. Adolf can you hang on for a moment?

ADOLF

Sheisse, I can not remember where I was in 1945, some of my best friends are...

JAQUI

Oh you silly man we want you to be the new head of the Met.

ADOLF

Bitte?

JAQUI

You're a bully who's lacking balls, you're perfect.

ADOLF

Ein volk, ein Reich, ein congestion charge!

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