Rescued

2 POLICE MEN TALKING.

PC1

I tell ya in this job you sometimes get to do some good. When I rescued that poor fat little thing from the evil bastards trying to make some easy money.

PC2

Coo PC Ivor Truncheon, was she drugged?

PC1

Drugged and tied up in a divan at TV centre.

PC2

Hang on Shannon Mathews was found in Manchester.

PC1

None Shanon Mathews I rescued John Sergant from strictly come dancing. Want to help me push Bruce Forsyth down the stairs?

PC2

To right, it won't be nice to see us.

Ok, Ivor Truncheon gets about a bit.

By the way, I heard Sergeant left Strictly Come Dancing because he didn't have enough ball room.

He's a senior office in the SootyJ rubbish pun division.

It's one of the busiest, dangerous and most pointless divisions in the met.

His only colleague is Amy Thingusay, who does the cautions.