Here's my sketch about fireworks. Boom boom.
INT. DINING ROOM – NIGHT
THE FAMILY (MUM, DAD, KIDS) HAVE JUST FINISHED DINNER
DAD:
Come on everybody, it's time for fireworks!
MUM:
Oh, Barry, we said we were going to cut back on unnecessary spending now the economy's in recession.
DAD:
The kids need to have some enjoyment. (BEAT). Anyway, I got these cheap.
MUM:
Please tell me you didn't get them from a "mate" down the pub.
DAD:
Nah (BEAT). Well, maybe, but Dave's in the importing business. They're the real deal, the ones the professionals use!
MUM:
If these are like those Chinese toys he gave us (BEAT). "They're the same ones they have in Hamley's," he said.
DAD:
They were.
MUM:
Yes, and the bloody paint on theirs contained mercury too! Except THEY accepted refunds.
DAD:
Aw, he's just trying to make a living. Anyway, the Chinese've been making fireworks for centuries. Come on!
CUT TO: BACK GARDEN. FAMILY'S DRESSED UP IN WOOLIES. DAD IS CROUCHED DOWN NEXT TO A LARGEISH BOX.
DAD:
Right, let's get this party started!
DAD OPENS THE BOX. HE REACHES IN AND PULLS OUT SOME PROTECTIVE PACKAGING:
DAD:
Hmm, (MORE FOAM COMES OUT).
Eh?
HE PULLS HIS ARMS OUT. WE SEE HE'S HOLDING A LAPTOP.
KIDS START CRYING. MUM GIVES DAD A DISAPPROVING "YOU'VE DONE IT AGAIN STARE."
DAD:
Oh, I didn't know they'd be THAT professional
Seemed like a good quickie idea at the time, but didn't really know where to take it.
