British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 948

Quote: Oldrocker @ July 30 2012, 9:19 PM BST

Top of the friggin page again !

Oh, good! it's not me this time.

Well I'll go to the top of the page!

Quote: keewik @ July 30 2012, 9:26 PM BST

Oh, good! it's not me this time.

Laughing out loud Laughing out loud Laughing out loud

I love the way we call in the troops whenever anything goes wrong - wars, fireman strikes, G4S being shit - now we have them filling empty seats in Olympic Arenas.

I hope none them get PTSD from having to see Tom Daley.

Fortunately if you ever get banned. The House Hold Cavalry is waiting to post 24/7 wind up arguments, racist statements and other trouble making malarkey.

God bless 'em!

Quote: sootyj @ July 30 2012, 10:04 PM BST

The House Hold Cavalry is waiting to post 24/7 wind up arguments, racist statements and other trouble making malarkey.

I heard the Househould Cavalry are on 24/7 standby to 'fill your seat'. ;)

Quote: Ignatius Rake @ July 30 2012, 1:10 PM BST

This just in...

Zimbabwe: Panties Mystery Solved

http://allafrica.com/stories/201207270102.html

Yike, did they burn alive a mentally retarded human?

Or perhaps it was a carved wooden figure or dried monkey corpse, used as an excuse by this person to cover his panty stealing and rape activities.

http://grist.org/list/dude-orders-80-year-old-lobster-at-restaurant-just-to-set-it-free/

Yay!

Quote: billwill @ July 31 2012, 2:12 AM BST

Or perhaps it was a carved wooden figure or dried monkey corpse, used as an excuse by this person to cover his panty stealing and rape activities.

I would say this is far more likely.

Quote: zooo @ July 31 2012, 9:17 AM BST

http://grist.org/list/dude-orders-80-year-old-lobster-at-restaurant-just-to-set-it-free/

Yay!

I don't understand; the lobster was too tough to eat, but still ended up in the restaurant?

It may have been a bit of a tourist attraction or something, being so big? Or maybe they were waiting for a Man vs Food type to come and order a massive one for the sake of it.

Quote: zooo @ July 31 2012, 9:17 AM BST

http://grist.org/list/dude-orders-80-year-old-lobster-at-restaurant-just-to-set-it-free/

Yay!

"the point is that nobody wants to eat an old lobster, because it’s depressing and tastes bad."

:D

Cunnilingus?

Quote: Nat Wicks @ July 31 2012, 9:58 AM BST

"the point is that nobody wants to eat an old lobster, because it’s depressing and tastes bad."

:D

Oh don't be so hard on yourself!

So now it'll be released and immediately eaten by a seal or something, thus ending it's cushy life.

http://news.sky.com/story/967204/urgent-appeal-for-girl-in-leeds-999-call Eep. :(
Anyone know a Stacey in Leeds? Hope they find them.

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