I'll do it. Gimmie some cash some ammo and a thermos.
I read the news today oh boy! Page 659
Quote: Gavin @ February 8 2012, 3:33 PM GMTI'll do it. Gimmie some cash some ammo and a thermos.
Dear Gavin,
Thank you for your patriotic offer. Please find enclosed a postal order for the equivalent of £7.50 in Argentine pesos, this being anticapted to be freely negotiable upon your arrival in the Falklands.
Unfortuantely I am unable to supply you with any ammo as this could be interpreted as a provocative gesture by the international community. I am sure you will cope without.
The British army are currently using the Lee-Henry thermos flask left over from the Crimean War; there is a multi-billion pound replacement programme, but delivery has now been put back to 2078; as costs continue to escalate the specification has been amended to reduce functionality - the user requirement is now for a flask which retains structural integrity if dropped from a height of no more than 1 centimetre onto a bed of duck down, and which is sufficient to keep drinks at a temperature no higher than ambient during winter and no lower than ambient in the summer; there is however a problem with the left handed screw fitting which has been found not to align with the right- threaded Euro cap, manufactured by a Franco -Italian consortium after the British procurement bid was inadvertently eaten by the EU Defence Commissioner's bichon-frise; the contract for the integral cup has been awarded to a US industrial concern and is based on the successful Tomahawk integrated beverage consumption vessel supplied to the US Armed forces - unfortunately there are compatibility issues as the Pentagon are refusing to release the exact dimensions to the British government in case of leaks, or indeed dribbles, to Al Quaeda.
I therefore advise you to bring your own thermos.
Good luck and jolly good show.
Air Chief Marshall Sir Dicky Ticker GCB DSO KBE BDSM
Chief of the Defence Staff
PS. The Port Stanley branch of the NFU have requested that to curb the unprecedented increase of sexually transmitted diseases in the ovine population all visiting military personal are equipped with prophylactic devices.
Quote: Timbo @ February 8 2012, 4:34 PM GMTDear Gavin,
Thank you for your patriotic officer. Please find enclosed a postal order for the equivalent of £7.50 in Argentine pesos, this being anticapted to be freely negotiable upon your arrival in the Falklands.
Unfortuantely I am unable to supply you with any ammo as this could be interpreted as a provocative gesture by the international community. I am sure you will cope without.
The British army are currently using the Lee-Henry thermos flask left over from the Crimean War; there is a multi-billion pound replacement programme, but delivery has now been put back to 2078; as costs continue to escalate the specification has been amended to reduce functionality - the user requirement is now for a flask which retains structural integrity if dropped from a height of no more than 1 centimetre onto a bed of duck down, and which is sufficient to keep drinks at a temperature no higher than ambient during winter and no lower than ambient in the summer; there is however a problem with the left handed screw fitting which has been found not to align with the right- threaded Euro cap, manufactured by a Franco -Italian consortium after the British procurement bid was inadvertently eaten by the EU Defence Commissioner's bichon-frise; the contract for the integral cup has been awarded to a US industrial concern and is based on the successful Tomahawk integrated beverage consumption vessel supplied to the US Armed forces - unfortunately there are compatibility issues as the Pentagon are refusing to release the exact dimensions to the British government in case of leaks, or indeed dribbles, to Al Quaeda.
I therefore advise you to bring your own thermos.
Good luck and jolly good show.
Air Chief Marshall Sir Dicky Ticker GCB DSO KBE BDSM
Chief of the Defence StaffPS. The Port Stanley branch of the NFU have requested that to curb the unprecedented increase of sexually transmitted diseases in the bovine population all visiting military personal are equipped with prophylactic devices.
Very well done Timbo.
Quote: DaButt @ February 8 2012, 3:15 PM GMTMy solution:
There are what, 2000 inhabitants? Send every one of them a military rifle and 500 rounds of ammunition. Give the hunters among them sniper rifles and veterans receive heavier machine guns. Send in a dozen troops to give them basic rifle instruction and it's settled. The total cost would be about $5 million -- probably less than the cost of sending a single warship to the region.
Taking the island would be a very bloody endeavor for the Argentines and they'd be condemned for attacking civilians in the first place.
We already have around 500 troops on the islands in addition to the RAF
and a local militia.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military_of_the_Falkland_Islands#Falkland_Islands_Defence_Force
In effect it is already the most heavily militarised part of the UK lands.
Far different than when they invaded before, when there were only about 30 marines there.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I reckon we should have deported all those rioters we had last year in London & Manchester to the almost empty one of the Falkland Island, given them some tents & perhaps some weapons and left them to it.
Then see if the Argies still wanted to invade.
Quote: DaButt @ February 8 2012, 3:15 PM GMTMy solution:
There are what, 2000 inhabitants? Send every one of them a military rifle and 500 rounds of ammunition. Give the hunters among them sniper rifles and veterans receive heavier machine guns. Send in a dozen troops to give them basic rifle instruction and it's settled. The total cost would be about $5 million -- probably less than the cost of sending a single warship to the region.
Taking the island would be a very bloody endeavor for the Argentines and they'd be condemned for attacking civilians in the first place.
Iran and Hezbollah have a proven track record of killing people in Buenos Aires and would certainly do it again. As long as they're Jews, of course.
The Falkland Islands Defence Force are aparently a skilled and well supplied militia with hitech gear.
Albeit the spent whole of the last war in a shed grumbling after going on duty for exactly half an hour before surrendering.
There are a few hundred marines who could probably knock over most of South America if sufficently bored or drunk.
Quote: Timbo @ February 8 2012, 4:34 PM GMTDear Gavin,
Thank you for your patriotic officer. Please find enclosed a postal order for the equivalent of £7.50 in Argentine pesos, this being anticapted to be freely negotiable upon your arrival in the Falklands.
Unfortuantely I am unable to supply you with any ammo as this could be interpreted as a provocative gesture by the international community. I am sure you will cope without.
The British army are currently using the Lee-Henry thermos flask left over from the Crimean War; there is a multi-billion pound replacement programme, but delivery has now been put back to 2078; as costs continue to escalate the specification has been amended to reduce functionality - the user requirement is now for a flask which retains structural integrity if dropped from a height of no more than 1 centimetre onto a bed of duck down, and which is sufficient to keep drinks at a temperature no higher than ambient during winter and no lower than ambient in the summer; there is however a problem with the left handed screw fitting which has been found not to align with the right- threaded Euro cap, manufactured by a Franco -Italian consortium after the British procurement bid was inadvertently eaten by the EU Defence Commissioner's bichon-frise; the contract for the integral cup has been awarded to a US industrial concern and is based on the successful Tomahawk integrated beverage consumption vessel supplied to the US Armed forces - unfortunately there are compatibility issues as the Pentagon are refusing to release the exact dimensions to the British government in case of leaks, or indeed dribbles, to Al Quaeda.
I therefore advise you to bring your own thermos.
Good luck and jolly good show.
Air Chief Marshall Sir Dicky Ticker GCB DSO KBE BDSM
Chief of the Defence StaffPS. The Port Stanley branch of the NFU have requested that to curb the unprecedented increase of sexually transmitted diseases in the bovine population all visiting military personal are equipped with prophylactic devices.
Excelent and frighteningly probable.
Rhino escapes zooo
I don't follow sports news.
But I just heard on the sports news that John Terry -- who I have heard of, he was the England captain -- is *in court* for racially insulting somebody.
In court? Is saying things illegal now?
I mean, racism is bad, but is it illegal? When the f**k did that happen?
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ February 9 2012, 1:05 AM GMTIn court? Is saying things illegal now?
Welcome to the wonderful world of hate crimes. 
Think used the word 'Negre' as in French language.
Quote: dellas @ February 9 2012, 7:25 AM GMTThink used the word 'Negre' as in French language.
Think that was the other one . . .
If Del's knowledge of French is at Professorship level then I suspect John Terry's is at an elementary level.
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ February 9 2012, 1:05 AM GMTJohn Terry -- who I have heard of, he was the England captain -- is *in court* for racially insulting somebody.
In court? Is saying things illegal now?
Some things are.
But what gets me is that he had to lose his job just because of the allegation, even though nothing's been proven; what happened to innocent until proved guilty? And then his boss says it doesn't seem right, and so now HE has to lose his job.
Is saying things illegel?
Some things...yes. Section 5 of the public order act has been going a while.
I don't think they should have made such a cheating, lying knob captain in the first place, but I suppose it's hard to find someone who isn't in the football world.