I read the news today oh boy! Page 655

I have mixed views on this. I understand all the 'teaching them violence stuff' but ... I DID smack both my sons when they were young. I didn't beat them up or anything but I don't see the problem with a short sharp lesson (smack) at the time of the incident (whatever it is) if they don't stop doing whatever it is when told. It's all very well saying you should reason with them, but does a 2-year-old want a long philosophical lecture on why they should't do what they insist on doing? I had a friend who'd have gouged her own eyes out rather than lift a finger to her child. So - she's refusing to let him have his own way about something, and what does this 2-year-old do? He gives her a right hard kick. Where did he learn the violence?
People who ALWAYS try the reasoning approach don't always succeed and can end up with some really obnoxious little turds as offspring.

I think what I'm saying is that it has to be a combination of both methods. And the child has to realise that at this point in their life, the adult is in control.

It was three. And, I discovered, had a track record of sinking its teeth into other children.

Note: I have never claimed to be normal and healthy.

I guess upto a certain age it's kinda ok in small amounts. But at what point does it become teaching by fear or intimidation? I mean your kids will always one day be bigger than you.

Once mine were old enough to understand the concept of 'don't touch, that it's hot' or 'don't stick needles in the plug sockets, it will hurt', then we could move on to a discussion of why it's not a good idea to chase the cat into a corner or hit the child next door, even if he is really annoying. And as cognition improves then the penalties can be adjusted accordingly. Deducting a fiver from pocket money or refusing to chauffeur a child to a party can instantly improve behaviour.

Quote: KLRiley @ February 1 2012, 7:39 PM GMT

I did, however, offer to bite a child once when the little shit bit Major and the mother didn't seem to think it was a problem, despite the clear pattern of teeth marks in Major's arm.

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My mother had to resort to that after my younger brother turned into a biter. One day he latched onto my stomach and my mother grabbed him and bit him on the arm. That was the end of his biting phase.

There's quite a difference between beating and whipping your kids with belts and switches and giving them the occasional swat on the diapered butt. I can only remember spanking my kids a couple of times and they turned out just fine. I have several friends who are all new-agey, touchy-feely when it comes to raising their kids ("We prefer to reason with them") and I can say that they are, without fail, the brattiest, most impossible children I have ever met.

And it's not like a smack has to actually hurt is it?
A hard tap will probably shock the kid into stopping what it's doing, I imagine?

If I ever need to amuse myself I can watch the Islington parents reasoning with 2 year old brat monsters in Waitrose.

"Now Tarquin why do you think mummy won't buy you monstermunch?"

But are we talking about the occaisonal smack on a child of very little age or maturity?

Or whacking kids say 4 or 5 plus?

Quote: zooo @ February 1 2012, 8:01 PM GMT

A hard tap will probably shock the kid into stopping what it's doing, I imagine?

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The shock is far worse than the swat as far as a young child is concerned. It's all about teaching a child that their actions are unacceptable. I could usually just put on my "don't do that again" face and my kids would usually settle down instantly.

You have to maintain your role as supreme ruler or even the youngest of children will take advantage of you and play parents like a fiddle. This video is classic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpSfThUv_pc

Quote: sootyj @ February 1 2012, 8:04 PM GMT

Or whacking kids say 4 or 5 plus?

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Kids that age rarely need a spanking. By that time you just send them to their room, make them stand in a corner, make them stay silent for 15 minutes, take away a favourite toy or something similar.

My neighbor makes his fighting kids hold hands and tell each other that they love each other. They'd rather be spanked.

Was it really neccesary to kill Binladen?>

Quote: DaButt @ February 1 2012, 8:09 PM GMT

Terrorists that age rarely need a spanking. By that time you just send them to their room, make them stand in a corner, make them stay silent for 15 minutes, take away a favourite toy or something similar.

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I agree!

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Quote: DaButt @ February 1 2012, 8:09 PM GMT

The shock is far worse than the swat as far as a young child is concerned. It's all about teaching a child that their actions are unacceptable. I could usually just put on my "don't do that again" face and my kids would usually settle down instantly.

Kids that age rarely need a spanking. By that time you just send them to their room, make them stand in a corner, make them stay silent for 15 minutes, take away a favourite toy or something similar.

My neighbor makes his fighting kids hold hands and tell each other that they love each other. They'd rather be spanked.

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Apologies that's what Lamy's proposing. It's not good though, brutality really does teach brutality.

Quote: sootyj @ February 1 2012, 8:13 PM GMT

It's not good though, brutality really does teach brutality.

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A swat or mild spanking is not brutality. They can save lives, even.

Not what I meant.

I was thinking more about slapping a 6 year old for cheeking you, kinda thing.

73 people killed at a football match in Egypt

Blimey

Who won?

Pyramid Rovers

Quote: lofthouse @ February 1 2012, 8:46 PM GMT

73 people killed at a football match in Egypt

Blimey

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What a bazaar thing to happen.