British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 2,783

Wrong sentiment - I couldn't give a flying F for local politics. The next thing is the media boring us rigid with who is going to get a seat in the looney bin.

Strong rumours going around now that Susan Hall just got her ass handed to her

only rumours of course 🤣

Khan and his cabal of Islamist mates have clearly rigged the election

The Britain First candidate boo's Khan during his victory speech

The Britain First candidate running solely on anti-immigration- finished behind Count Binface 🤣

'Silent majority' blah blah blahhhh my arse

Well, the Trumpian "Stop the Steal" narrative has started, as predicted.
Luckily, it's all piss & wind.

Wow

Rishi Sunak actually putting it out there that if you extrapolate the results of the local elections to a general election , we are heading for a hung parliament

What complete and utter garbage

Local elections and general elections are two COMPLETELY different beasts

If you listen to this moron that means the Greens will end up with about 50 MP's , there will be about 80 "Independent" MP's etc

What about Scotland and Wales??

People vote completely differently in the two elections and they vote tactically and the turn out is completely different

The only election result that can remotely point to what may happen in a general election election is a by election- like the one in Blackpool last week , where the swing to Labour was over 20% against the tories

Either he is stupid enough to actually believe this politically ignorant nonsense being put about by the Mail- or he thinks WE are stupid enough to believe him when he says this

Hundreds and hundreds of polls for two years ALL point to a Labour majority

Anyway this lie could work against him, if apathetic Labour supporters think there's a chance Labour isn't a shoe in they will be more likely to drag themselves down to the polling station

In other news, if Trump doesn't shut his f**king mouth the judge is going to throw him in jail

PLEASE DONT SHUT YOUR MOUTH

🤞🤞🤞

Indeed, you can't predict it from locals. Yeah there's a sort of indication of public feeling, but in terms of numbers there's no predicting it. Be it someone claiming a hung parliament, or a majority for Labour. Nobody from Wales, Scotland, or NI were involved in the locals!

I think if Labour land a majority it won't be as massive as some polls are saying. I'm thinking maybe the same amount of seats Tories picked up in 2019, at the most.

It's very difficult to say but yes I don't really believe these polls that say Labour will get a over 100 seat majority

Around 50-ish is more realistic

Now if you had said to me in 2019 after Boris won , Labour will win in 2024 with ANY majority at all , I would have said you were round the twist

So 50-ish is miraculous

Apparently there has been an assassination attempt on Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman. According to Twitter several of his body guards are dead,
There was time I would have suspected Mossad but its more likely to be a gang of drunk Geordies who were just looking for selfies and it turned nasty When the Prince said no.

It turned out to be bogus that's a shame.

Seems horribly possible Trump could actually win in November. Under normal circumstances, the fact that he is a convicted sex offender would be enough on it's own to completely destroy his candidacy. Along with about a billion other things.

By the same token of course, it seems equally horribly possible that an octogenarian who rarely knows where he - or anything else - is, has difficulty standing upright and is implicated in the crimes of his son could be the most powerful man in the western world for a further four years.

And, of course, how much safer the world has become since he was first elected four years ago(!)

The difference is stark, Biden is old and misses stuff but he is just front of house for his party. He has advisers and a VP and in turn this party has policies and structures. Trump is a dictator with no heir and no party he is a deranged sexual predator who has stolen millions from people and always had his way, allegedly even with his daughter. Thats the the difference.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 8th May 2024, 8:40 AM

By the same token of course, it seems equally horribly possible that an octogenarian who rarely knows where he - or anything else - is, has difficulty standing upright and is implicated in the crimes of his son could be the most powerful man in the western world for a further four years.

And, of course, how much safer the world has become since he was first elected four years ago(!)

Do you honestly think the world would be safer with Trump as president again? How?
Biden has occasionally made verbal slips and mixed up leaders' names in public. Trump often does this too!
Hunter Biden isn't in office. It's irrelevant. Even Biden's opponents have abandoned this case now.
Trump is a convicted sex offender. He is on trial for one thing and awaiting trial for three other things. He attempted to overturn a legitimate democratic election by encouraging a violent insurrection. He suggested in public people should inject themselves with bleach. He knowingly risked infecting Biden and many others in 2020.
He is a concern!

Trump has referred to Biden as Obama by mistake on several occasions in his ridiculous speeches

He's just as senile

Read this pile of drivel he came our with recently at one of his cult rallies....

"Gettysburg, wow--I go to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, to look and to watch," he said. "And the statement of Robert E. Lee, who's no longer in favor--did you ever notice it? He's no longer in favor. 'Never fight uphill, me boys, never fight uphill.' They were fighting uphill, he said, 'Wow, that was a big mistake,' he lost his great general. 'Never fight uphill, me boys,' but it was too late," Trump added.

"Gettysburg, what an unbelievable battle that was. The Battle of Gettysburg," the former president said Saturday. "What an unbelievable―I mean, it was so much and so interesting, and so vicious and horrible, and so beautiful in so many different ways."

Wow...

Natalie Elphicke, the MP for Dover, has defected to the Labour Party. She crossed the floor of the Commons shortly before #PMQs began.

She said "many things have changed" since she joined the Tories in 2019, and now "the modern Labour Party looks to the future".

Share this page