British Comedy Guide

I read the news today oh boy! Page 1,060

Given a choice between a date with jerry hall and a fat gay guy with a beard?

Quote: zooo @ November 18 2012, 11:15 PM GMT

I'd still prefer a wolf to a bear! Which is what I was saying. Not that wolves are lovely. You mentalist.

Mej each to their own

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ November 18 2012, 11:19 PM GMT

Sorry if I inferred that you were a 'wolf lover'.

Ha. Should think so too!

I think we should have more wild cats. They are little and furry and would keep to themselves. But I would still try to tempt one to my garden and make friends. (And get attacked in the face.)

Well, we've just fed the fox, so if any of you don't approve, you can bugger off. At least it keeps rats away.

lol I originally read it as between a wolf vs a beer, I thought it was a no brainer until I re-read it. haha

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ November 18 2012, 11:07 PM GMT

They banned red deer hunting in Scotland

That will come as shock to all those deerstalking estates.

Licensed shooting in season of all deer species is permitted throughout the UK.

Quote: Outqube @ November 18 2012, 11:21 PM GMT

lol I originally read it as between a wolf vs a beer, I thought it was a no brainer until I re-read it. haha

Heh! I might still prefer the wolf to be honest...

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ November 18 2012, 11:12 PM GMT

I mean wolves, the same wolves that attack children

Wolves will only attack humans if habituated.

Same is true of other canines. One night that fox is going to have keewik's face off.

Quote: Tursiops @ November 18 2012, 11:30 PM GMT

Same is true of other canines. One night that fox is going to have keewik's face off.

Doubt it. Not if it wants to keep having nice food!

Quote: Tursiops @ November 18 2012, 11:30 PM GMT

Wolves will only attack humans if habituated.

Same is true of other canines. One night that fox is going to have keewik's face off.

It hides behind a tub till we leave the food and go inside.

One day that tubll be gone and youll be done

Quote: Tursiops @ November 18 2012, 11:25 PM GMT

That will come as shock to all those deerstalking estates.

Scotland has somewhere between 300,000-500,000 red deer. Most of them don't reside on hunting estates.

I think it is possible to hunt deer on government land, but it's very difficult and the Forestry Commission seem to prefer doing it themselves.

Still, I just saw this - http://scottishwildlifetrust.org.uk/news/deer-cull-should-continue-says-scottish-wildlife-trust/

So even the deer charities are asking for help. But with such strict gun ownership, the costs of hunting in the UK, the political and social backlash of anything to do with guns and deer and I'm not surprised the populations are so large.

Quote: Stylee TingTing @ November 18 2012, 11:32 PM GMT

What, like domestic dogs do?

*I made a funny*

Personally, I'd like to see a ban on all dog ownership in inner cities and on certain breeds which are known to have inherent mental conditions.

As weird as it sounds, most dogs are 'unnatural' - they have been selectively bred over centuries to create the breeds we have today. So along with body size, head shape and fighting abilities, we've also bred some really bad brains.

Quote: Stylee TingTing @ November 18 2012, 11:54 PM GMT

Isn't that what your parents said?

Personally, if I were a deer/wolf/tree, I know who I'd cull..

Not sure how to respond to this, so here's a weird picture from the Internet instead -

Image
Quote: Renegade Carpark @ November 18 2012, 11:44 PM GMT

Scotland has somewhere between 300,000-500,000 red deer. Most of them don't reside on hunting estates.

Jeeze, that's a f**k of a lot really isnt it...even taking the lower figure as the correct one. These rebelious red deer just won't fill in the f**kin census forms will they? Bastards.

I reckon we don't need that many surely, do we?

Cull them down big time I say...about 50,000 sounds about right. Venison prices will crash too, and as this is a healthy meat compared to duck, lamb, pork and beef, it would be affordable to the masses. This, in turn, would reduce cost-pressure on the NHS as the benefits of healthy eating kicks in.

On that note, a chav cull would also be a good idea too. We would save billions doing that. Plus we could also sell licences for those who want to cull the chavs too...double bubble.

:O We all know Israel will win....

Quote: dellas @ November 19 2012, 10:37 AM GMT

:O We all know Israel will win....

Not necessarily, they might have the weapons to win the battle, but if they lost the world's support, they could lose the 'war.' Golda Meir knew all about that in the run up to the Yom Kippur war, when she let her enemies make the first move so that she wouldn't look like the aggressor, and perhaps the Israelis will do the same again, who knows; but if they don't, they could find themselves in a bad political position.

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