Think might be a bit obvious and have some tenuous links, but the Clarkson story meant I couldn't resist:
ANDREW SACHS AND GEORGINA BAILLIE ARE SITTING AT A TABLE, WHEN THE HOTEL OWNER WALKS OVER TO THEM:
OWNER:
Good afternoon Mr Sachs, Miss Baillie. Can I get you a drink?
ANDREW SACHS:
Yes, please. Can I have some water? In a glass?
OWNER:
What? Russell Brand f**ed your granddaughter? In the…?
AS:
No, I said I'd like some water.
OWNER:
Sorry? No, I didn't mention the whore. And what can I get you, young lady?
GB:
Just water too. Can I also order the asparagus tart?
OWNER:
Certainly, so that's aparagus for the tart…
AS:
Sir, you have no right to speak to her like that. Can't you see you're upsetting her.
OWNER:
Well, she started it.
AS:
No she didn't
OWNER:
Yes she did. She slept with Russell Brand
AS:
Come on Georgina, let's go. There's a Pizza Hut round the corner where they know how to be behave.
OWNER:
Eh? She's a Satanic Slut in a porno, and she kept a sex slave?
SACHS AND BAILLIE GET UP ANGRILY AND LEAVE.
JEREMY CLARKSON ENTERS.
OWNER:
Jeremy Clarkson! (TO JEREMY) Whatever you do, don't mention the whore! I did once, but I think I got away with it. So let's all just forget all about it.
ENTER MANUEL (SACHS), WHO THUMPS CLARKSON AND THE OWNER ON THE HEAD WITH A FRYING PAN:
MANUEL:
Oh Meester, the BBC is Faulty, it presenters are chauvinists and sexual deviants, only a semi-racist Spanish stereotype can save it now!
