MANDELSON AND OSBOURNE ARE DOING A RADIO BROADCAST.
OSBOURNE
Hello you groovy f**kers, filling in for Ross and Brand it's England's 2 grooviest senior politicians.
MANDELSON
Mandy the Dandy.
GEORGE.
And George the toff with the pay off Osbourne.
MANDELSON
So Georgie what have you been upto this week?
GEORGE.
Oh the usual Dave, Boris and the rest of the Bullingdon gang went hunting.
MANDELSON
Deer?
GEORGE
No peasants, we run them over in one of Boris's bendy buses. You hunted deer?
MANDELSON
All over Hampstead heath.
GEORGE
I'm bored Mandy lets make a phone call, let's call Nathan Rothschild.
MANDELSON
Yes lets.
VO
This is Nathan Rothschild sorry I can't answer the phone, if that's Osbourne you've already had £50,000 you greedy swine.
GEORGE
Cheeky sod! Oi Rothschild Mandelson screwed your big Russian on his boat, in the poop deck.
MANDELSON
George stop that.
GEORGE
He's insatiable he's screwed all his colleagues and the EU.
MANDELSON
This is stupid. We've already tapped Rothschild and Depraskia let's call Mithal.
GEORGE
Hey is that Laksmi Mithal the steel billionaire? I foundry you very attractive, give us a bung big boy.