British Comedy Guide

Junior Monopoly

Please note I have no idea if the lexicon and syntax are correct in this sketch due to me not being 14.

HOME BOYS LEOPARD AND MASHMAN DECIDE TO HAVE A LEISURELY GAME OF MONOPOLY

LEOPARD ROLLS HIS DICE
LEOPARD:
I is rolled an eight init.
HE MOVES HIS PIECE
One, two, three, four, five (BEAT), six (BEAT), seven, eight booo init.

MASHMAN:
What is you doing init?

LEOPARD:
I is moving me piece know what I mean. Is you got prob with that init.

MASHMAN:
You ain't landing on Fleet Street know what I mean. You disrepecting me and the Fleet Street Posssseeeee. This is my gang area, we owns it init.

LEOPARD:
You Ownz it not init, Fleet Street batty. I aint respectin' no zone. I is Pall Mall boyz and we is takin' you down init.

MASHMAN:
You man is break your asbo you what I mean. You is diss's me init.

LEOPARD AND MASHMAN STAB EACH OTHER TO DEATH

This made i giggle.

I think that this a very real take on the yoof of today. It is proper well bangin' observed an' that.

But you is not right guy. De Bond St gang is kings an that ain't it?

Lovely sketch and I laughed out loud very funny.

Nice, a very simple counterpoint skit, that works

Well... I'm afraid for me it stalled precisely because, as you admit, the language isn't spot on. IMO it needs to be for it to work. Interesting concept but putting 'innit' after every sentence does not well observed language make. Pretty lazy really, innit. You see, I am very down with the kids. I lived in Leicester for 3 years anyway.

Quote: James Williams @ February 11, 2008, 10:08 PM

Well... I'm afraid for me it stalled precisely because, as you admit, the language isn't spot on. IMO it needs to be for it to work. Interesting concept but putting 'innit' after every sentence does not well observed language make. Pretty lazy really, innit. You see, I am very down with the kids. I lived in Leicester for 3 years anyway.

Well James I'm 39, so despite you pointing out as you have before that I'm fluent in bollocks, it is unfortunately the wrong dialect for this sketch.

Laughing out loud

Quote: Rob B @ February 11, 2008, 10:24 PM

Well James I'm 39, so despite you pointing out as you have before that I'm fluent in bollocks, it is unfortunately the wrong dialect for this sketch.

?

I could barely tell what you were writing (probably because the closest i've ever heard anyone talk like that is Ali G) but I even thought it was a very funny sketch. It totally see it work in North America too if you just changed to language to gangster slang. It could be a sort of Dave Chapelle sketch.

I agree with James, the dialogue just doesn't ring true.

Hang around some school gates until you get it right.

Then it'll be nang.

Quote: Rob B @ February 11, 2008, 10:24 PM

Well James I'm 39, so despite you pointing out as you have before that I'm fluent in bollocks, it is unfortunately the wrong dialect for this sketch.

Being 39 ain't no excuse dread. I is 41, but I know it ain't posse - it's crew.

The sketch is dark though.

Quote: Blenkinsop @ February 11, 2008, 10:01 PM

I think that this a very real take on the yoof of today. It is proper well bangin' observed an' that.

Diaglogue does need a bit of work, I hung around with too many chavs when I younger, it's nearly there... init.

And I disagree Blekinsop, if we had a problem we tended to solve it with fisty cuffs or a dual at dawn.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ February 12, 2008, 10:42 AM

Being 39 ain't no excuse dread. I is 41, but I know it ain't posse - it's crew.

The sketch is dark though.

I actually listened to a conversation some weeks ago on a train in which I understood about 10% of what was being said, and 9% of that was "init, know what I mean"

I lack the retrograde language skillz to have written this properly, but wanted to anyway as I thought the artificial boundary thing is so insane. So somebody rewrite this sketch so that I don't understand it please!

I like this sketch at lot.

It's very funny and I love the last line.

Good funny sketch. I didn't have a problem with the innits, that's how they talk like, innit?

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