Child on board

you know those diamond shaped signs people put in the back window of their cars?? they say things like 'baby on board' or 'princess on board' etc...

start off with a row of 3 cars at traffic lights, the first car is a citreon saxo with pink fluffy seat covers and theres a young girl at the wheel and as the camera goes back theres one of those signs with 'princess on board' on, the next car is a people carrier with a middle aged couple in the front and a child's seat with a kid in on the back seat and again as the camera goes back theres a sign with says 'child on board'. the third and last car is a crappy old brown mini with a scruffy man in, thick glasses, beard, parker coat, pack of haribo on the dash and when the camera goes back the punchline of the joke is the sign says 'pedo on board' !!

Like it.

A couple of my friends have a theory that all pedos look exactly how you'd imagine a pedo to look when they're in the paper, so police should have powers just to go around and arrest anyone who looks like 'that' as a preventative measure. i suppose 'evil librarian' kind of sums-up the look.

Oh, and I liked the sketch.

they do tho !!!! u can spot em a mile away !!! not sure if you'd wanna go down the whole pedo joke route tho !!!

I think it works on the level that it has the recognition where everyone knows the signs you mean and I'd expect if it was shown on a TV sketch show, many viewers would even HAVE those very signs themselves, so you are halfway there with a waiting in anticipation laugh, even before you get to the main punch line, so it's practically a BOGOF gag!

Nice one, although I do understand your hesitance regarding the subject matter but think it’s OK to do it, as long as it’s the paedophiles who are seen as the victims of the joke.

Reminds me of an old joke (please look away now if easily offended) where the paedo, as of your typical description, pulls his over car, opens the door and says to a kid playing football in the steet.

"Would you like to come in my car for a sweetie?"

and the kid replies

"Gimme a fiver mate and I'll come in yer face!"

Apologies again but like I said, when it's the wrong-doer who comes off worse, then I think anything is fair game, even if in this case it was a bit of an ewwwwwww one.

There's too much apologising on these forums generally i think, if you go to see a stand-up (big generalisation on it's way...) you'll hear plenty of gags that are far more offensive than the things we publish on here so people shouldn't worry about it.

true !!!

I liked this but I've told you that already, boo

lol@ima_mazed.

It was o.k. But I can't imagine where it would fit in, what kind of show would have it.

I think it would work better in one of those comic strip jokes.

didnt really think that far ahead to be honest

Like it Boo - could do a whole series of these gags - like a visual version of the many 'bumper-sticker' gags you used to see. Perhaps later on in a sketch show we go back to the same scene where we have just seen the 'Pedo on Board' sign and the camera goes back even further to the car following the Pedo where there is a hard looking b*st*rd driving a Capri with a Baseball Bat in the car....cue shot of 'Vigilante on Board' etc etc.
Good stuff mate.
P.S. Boo Warren - are you trying to scare the shit out of some poor wee bunnies?

ha ha like it andy, you could go back another car and and have a man re arranging his air freshners stuck on his dash board and looking really concerned then the sign saying 'obsessive compulsive on board' !!!

i love the bunnies, playboy or chocolate

and then the next car where we see a 14 year-old hoodie on board driving erratically...pull back to see 'Thieving little bastard on board'.....
we could go on forever with these.....I'd better stop before I go over-board

Boo ... good stuff. Also Andy got me wondering if all those cars could be depicted driving in a circle somehow (say round an NCP car park) then you could maybe link the 'first car' to the 'last car' in some way (maybe the sticker on the car in front of the 'baby on board' car has sticker like Swingers O.B. or Anti-Abortionists O.B. or suchlike).
Seems a good extendable gag to me!

you could go on for ever your right !!! there could be no one at the wheel and the sign says 'imaginary friend on board', i think i would of stopped laughing by the 5th car tho