Brushes with the law

Not convictions (you know who you are! ) but interactions good or bad with the boys, girls and LGBTs in blue.

When I was about 14 (around 1980) I was with mates drinking a couple of cans of Skol in a local bandstand in a locked park. Someone shouted 'cops' and we all ran. My mate, who was a county level runner got caught. I couldn't leave him on his own so I went back and 'surrendered'.

We weren't arrested but were handcuffed and taken to a police station where we were sat in a room for what seemed hours and then taken home. It turned out that there had been recent burglaries in the park (or that's what the police said when they told my mum I hadn't actually done anything).

Thinking back 32 years, I don't think the bobbies even mentioned I had been taken to the station, or that I had been drinking, and funnily enough - neither did I.

I seem to remember that it gave me a positive impression of the police.

First time I was pregnant I got chased by cops on motorbikes when I went up a one-way street the wrong way.

Second time I was pregnant I got stopped for speeding.

Got off both times.

A few years ago got stopped in Argyll for doing 44 mph in a 30 zone. Incredibly they let me off.

When I was a kid and hung around with my dickhead mate, he thought it was funny to put shit on the train tracks, including the cables that rain along the side. I knew it was the dumbest thing ever and tried in my 9 year old way to tell him to stop. Later that night on the news, there was a story about a the whole of our areas networks cutting out and even a train crash. F**k I shit myself.

Next day I was out the back road of my house with a f**king hammer, whacking the concrete posts to get sparks. Next thing my Mum shouts me into the house, so I run in with a huge hammer and I'm greeted by the world's tallest policeman who lectures me, with furious tears of passion in his eyes about the dangers of playing on the track.

All I remember thinking is that my little dickedhead "mate" had ratted me out, even though I didn't do anything. Bastard.

Are you Chris Huhne?

Quote: keewik @ March 5 2013, 10:47 PM GMT

First time I was pregnant I got chased by cops on motorbikes when I went up a one-way street the wrong way.

Second time I was pregnant I got stopped for speeding.

Got off both times.

A few years ago got stopped in Argyll for doing 44 mph in a 30 zone. Incredibly they let me off.

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Quote: Lee @ March 5 2013, 11:05 PM GMT

When I was a kid and hung around with my dickhead mate, he thought it was funny to put shit on the train tracks, including the cables that rain along the side. I knew it was the dumbest thing ever and tried in my 9 year old way to tell him to stop. Later that night on the news, there was a story about a the whole of our areas networks cutting out and even a train crash. F**k I shit myself.

Next day I was out the back road of my house with a f**king hammer, whacking the concrete posts to get sparks. Next thing my Mum shouts me into the house, so I run in with a huge hammer and I'm greeted by the world's tallest policeman who lectures me, with furious tears of passion in his eyes about the dangers of playing on the track.

All I remember thinking is that my little dickedhead "mate" had ratted me out, even though I didn't do anything. Bastard.

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I was coming back from the railway station one night and a policeman stopped me and told me a man had been doing something suspicious in some bushes nearby. When I pressed him on what he wouldn't tell me, but still demanded my name and address. And shone a torch in my face.

I don't think a man had been doing anything in any bushes. The policeman was just mad on power.

They once caught me and my friend (both drunk as newts) taking away a lamp from a building lot. A young and an older more laid back cop. The young cop: "That is theft". The old one: "Ah come on...we were young too once". We got away with a small lecture on not behaving like two idiotic tits.

I was once almost arrested for, whilst drunk, making it all the way home, only to fail at the last moment and attempt to gain access to the house next door convinced it was my own and that my housemates had changed the lock on me.

A few years ago some people were trying to break into cars in our street. I phoned the police and my husband followed the criminals. I could see what was going on from the bedroom window so I stayed on the phone and updated the police. By the time the Police arrived the criminals had left our street but my husband was at the end of road watching them. The Police tried to arrest my husband.

Me and a friend aged about 12, climbed a fall pipe to see the the girls in the local pantomime getting undressed and changing.
A bobby saw us and shouted for us to get down.
We told him to sod off and climbed the fall pipe on to the roof.

He climbed the fall pipe onto the roof in hot pursuit and we legged it across the very steep and slippery roof tops.

We came to the far edge and could go no further. Like Butch and Sundance, we agreed that when the copper came over the last peak, we would jump.
He could not get up the slippery roof and gave up and went back down.

We waited 2 hours before we dare get back down.

A Saturday night in Norwich. Circa 1988.

In an area called Tombland by the cathedral, not far from a pub recently vacated by me and my mate called The Ribs of Beef, we were stopped by the Old Bill. Why? Because we had commandeered a vehicle for humourous purposes.

Because we were cheerful souls and not really doing any harm we were let off with a warning.

WPC: "We can hardly charge you for being drunk in charge of a shopping trolley can we."

Quote: chipolata @ March 6 2013, 1:00 PM GMT

I was coming back from the railway station one night and a policeman stopped me and told me a man had been doing something suspicious in some bushes nearby. When I pressed him on what he wouldn't tell me, but still demanded my name and address. And shone a torch in my face.

I don't think a man had been doing anything in any bushes. The policeman was just mad on power.

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Asking your name and address is hardly 'mad on power' now is it?

Driving home from a gig at the Hope & Anchor ( Ian Dury & the Blockheads) with a car full of mates and a belly full of beer, I managed to overshoot the lights at the Angel and career into a small square...straight in front of a police van full of filth.
I thought the wisest thing would be to reverse up to them and apologise.
I reversed up and hit their van.
The only reason I got away with it was that they were laughing so much they couldn't be arsed to book me.

whilst slaloming round the center white lines in the road, drunk as a lord on my pride and joy of a Lambretta scooter, a panda car with light flashing pulled in front of me.
I couldn't stop in time and ran into the back of it.

The copper gave me a bollocking and told me to leave it at the curb and walk home.
I walked about 2 miles then nipped back for it.
As I put my hands on the handlebars a booming voice from the dark said 'I told you to walk home'

I was arrested once. Three police men arrived at our house at 6.30. And carted me off. Locked up in a cell. No shoes in case I hung my 43 stone frame with my laces. 2 hours of questioning by Juliet Bravo.

Seriously.

Quote: bigfella @ March 7 2013, 7:53 AM GMT

I was arrested once. Three police men arrived at our house at 6.30. And carted me off. Locked up in a cell. No shoes in case I hung my 43 stone frame with my laces. 2 hours of questioning by Juliet Bravo.

Seriously.

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And? Were you guilty?